Thing jokes
What's the sharpest thing in the world?
A fart... it goes straight through your pants without leaving a hole.
There has to be someone that hates watersharky. He curses at you if you say one thing about his friends or him. He just is mean and needs to leave.
I fell into a water bed with super soil. Next thing I'm in a flower bed.
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
The best thing about an orphan? They don’t have to suffer from "your mama" jokes.
Memes
A computer usually has a HARD drive. LESSON. No wonder they remember things.
"I'm sorry" and "my bad" mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.
Roblox jokes on this page in a nutshell: something about Roblox girlfriends, and "Add me on Roblox. My name is Sonicboy100299easyarsenaltowerofhellproxdlol."
What do dino nuggies and the brown M&M have in common?
I want to fuck them both.
What does Joyce from the show "Stranger Things" say when she has a flat tire? "Wheil, wheil, wheres wheil?"
I looked this quote up, but it really is a good thing, just for starters.
"Sometimes you will never know the VALUE of a moment until it becomes a MEMORY."
What is an orange?
World's only not rhyming thing. Hehhhehehehehhe.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Covid.
Covid who?
The thing that killed half a billion people!
What's the best thing about 23 year olds? There are twenty of them.
"The truest things ARE the funniest things."
-Lollipop from JacknJellify, the BFDI series.
What's the last thing to go through the minds of 9/11 victims?
Their kneecaps.
A guy is walking down the street when he almost steps in something. He looks down and says, "Looks like shit."
He crouches down and smells it, "Smells like shit."
He sticks his finger in, tastes it, "Tastes like shit."
He then smiles and says, "Well, good thing I didn't step on it!"
What's one thing that you can say about a train, but not your girlfriend?
What's the most embarrassing thing about locking your keys in the car outside a pregnancy care center?
Having to go inside and ask for a coat hanger.
Why did the parachute break up with the skydiver?
Because it was tired of being taken for granted every time things fell apart.