Thing jokes
The best part about having autism is being able to make jokes about genociding autistic people and no one can say a damn thing.
What is the similar thing between alcohol and anal sex?
They are not for kids.
What has one head, one foot and four legs? A: A Bed
Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof? A: Never mind, it's over your head!
Q: How many letters are in The Alphabet? A: There are 11 letters in The Alphabet
Q: How can you spell cold with two letters? A: IC (icy)
Q: What state is surrounded by the most water? A: Hawaii (this is really just a trick riddle)
Q: David's father had three sons: Snap, Crackle, and ? A: David!
Q: If you were in a rainforest, what would be the first thing you put on? A: The radio!
"Number 15: Burger King foot lettuce. The last thing you want in your Burger King burger is someone's foot fungus, but as it turns out, that might be what you get."
No matter how big the jar, there is one thing that can never fit inside it. What is it?
9/11, 911, same thing.
What's the worst thing about eating a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
A man had 10 dead and bloody babies in the middle of his living room. The police suddenly knocked on his door. What is the hardest thing to hide?
- A boner.
What was the last thing Stephen Hawking said before he died?
"Windows Shut Down."
Schools in the hood are kind of the same thing. I always seem to get shot.
Fail and fall mean the same thing when it’s downstairs.
What's the best thing about 20-1 year olds... there's 20.
So uh, I did this thing where I put soap on my brother's toothbrush, and then I put more on and colored it to make it look like toothpaste, and uh, he is constipated now. I AM EVIL :3
What's the best thing about dead baby jokes?
They never get old.
What is the first thing you would do if you woke up as a woman?
"Probably the dishes."
The only thing funnier than the shooting of that healthcare CEO is imagining the look on his wife's face when she got the hospital bill.
When your girlfriend says it is too small, you say, "Just enjoy the small thing."
Nothing is lost until Mom can't find it.
What’s one thing Obama proved during his presidency?
No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he’s still going to have the cops on his back.
What's one thing your dad shares with black men? Your sister.