Thing Jokes

What's an Orphans Favorite Toy? A boomerang because it's the only thing that comes back

You know having an uncle is a good thing sometimes! I get a pair of shoes every week. He says it’s my reward for playing the tickle game with him in his damp and dark basement. It hurts sometimes. But hey, new shoes!

friend: how's it going? me: good, things are good! parent: how are you? me: oh I'm fine! Twitter: compose new tweet? me: hellooooo l would like to tell you about my anxiety & my current greatest fears & let's talk about the impending apocalypse while we're at it

one thing led to another, now i have a new patio

Me: i am the second worst thing that happened to these orphans

Friend: what was the first

Me: the- they weren't always orphans

friend: o-o

why didn't the orphans stay at the park for days? because they had no one to pick them up. what's a orphans best friend? a boomarange because it's the only thing that ever came back.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Why is my sister so annoying because

Put your own thing in

Last post for today, but I had to say one more thing!!! Tomorrow I am going to six flags, and I am literally so excited! It is going to be so much fun. Hope you guys have a good MLK JR day!!!!!! Woohooo!!!!

I was looking at our Human Services Minister and thinking I'm surprised he's married. The things you do for your cousins!

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Girl: Come Over. Orphan: I can’t. Girl: My parents aren’t home ;) Orphan: Just two things I don’t have.

I'm sorry and I apologise mean the same thing except at a funeral.

What's the best thing about Switzerland? The flag is a big plus.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Some moving men had just begun their days work. The first thing they brought into the house was a huge couch. The owner came in and asked how everything was going. They replied, "Sofa so good."