They jokes
Why do orphans love tennis?
Because it is the only place they can get love.
The Twin Towers were like a woman stuck in the washer machine. They both got freed.
How do baseballs communicate?
They touch base!
what do baby’s and grenades have in common?
They both are silent but then when thrown at someone make a loud noise
The twins ordered pepperoni, but they got plain.
What happened when your parents dropped you off at the orphanage? They got sued for littering.
Why don't booties make good drummers?
They can't keep a beat without making a FART NOISE.
What do my parents have in common with Nemo? They can't be found.
Little Timmy walked in on his parents having sex. His parents look at him in fear. Little Timmy asks, "Mom, Dad, what are you doing?"
The mom replies with, "We are playing house. We'll let you play when you're older," the dad says. So the next day Timmy goes over to play with his friend Johnny, who was, ironically, Timmy's neighbor. Johnny asks, "How was your sleep last night?" "I saw my mom and dad playing house last night," Timmy says. "But they told me I could play with them when I'm older."
After a little bit of playing with Johnny, Timmy went home and saw his Dad playing house with his babysitter. "Dad, what are you doing?" Timmy asks. "I'm playing house with your babysitter," Timmy's Dad said. "But I saw you play house with Mom last night," Timmy told his father. "Well, don't tell your mother," his dad said.
A little girl and a little boy are taking a bath together when the little girl looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little boy says, "That’s my little red race car."
Ten minutes later, the boy looks down and asks, "What's that?"
The little girl says, "That’s my little red race car garage."
So later that night, the little boy asks the little girl if he can put his little red race car in her little red race car garage. She said yes, and then they pull down their pants and the boy tries putting his little red race car in her garage, but it won’t fit.
Downstairs, the mother hears an ear-piercing scream and runs up the stairs, flips on the lights and sees blood on the floor. The mother asks, "What happened?"
The little girl says, "We tried putting his car in my garage and it wouldn’t fit, so I cut the back wheels off."
What do emos and a bird nest have in common?
They both hang from a tree.
Why are retards good at basketball?
'Cause they dribble all the time!
Why can't orphans be gay? Because then they would be home-osexual.
Why are orphans bad at basketball?
They haven't learned how to keep the ball with them.
Three people explored the jungles, one was from France, one from Britain, and the other from America.
While exploring, they were captured by the tribe living there. The tribesmen told the three, "You three have invaded our territory, so we must kill you and use your bodies to create canoes. However, we aren't that heartless, so we'll let you choose your deaths."
So the French guy asked for a gun, pointed to his head, and said "Viva la France!" and shot himself. The Britain guy requested poison and said, "For the Queen!" and drank the poison. Lastly, the American asked for a spoon. The tribesmen were confused but still gave him the spoon. When the American got the spoon, he started stabbing himself, "Try make a canoe out of this one!"
Why do planets circle the sun?
'Cause they like the game of ring-around-the-rosy.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
In British chess I guess they play without a queen...
But in American chess they play without 2 towers.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
It’s because they can’t find home plate.
No one wanted to hear my ocean puns, they said they were too fishy.