Thereness jokes
Jack and Jill went up the hill to have some hankery panky.
Silly Jill forgot her pill,
And now there's little Frankey.
McDonald's called back and they said they want their logo back.
I made a website for orphans.
There’s no homepage.
Cemeteries are so popular! People are, like... dying to get there.
There never was a historical Jesus Christ. Hey, do not even dream of crucifying me.
Me: Hey God, are you there? It's me, Michael.
God: *SILENCE*
Me: If any gods exist, they better say or do something this instant!
God: *SILENCE*
Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Q: How do you turn a cat into a fish?
A: Tell the woman not to wash down there.
What is the similarity between an orphan and the new Spider-Man movie, "There's No Way Home"?
Me: How do you celebrate Christmas?
Orphan: I don't know what you mean.
Me: There is no one to give a present.
Yo mamma so fat, when God said, "Let there be light," he was just asking her to get out the way.
Did you know that they are making a movie about the four boys who lost their lives on the ice? They're calling the movie "The Lost Boys."
Pick up lines.
"One fish, two fish, three fish, I’m breaking up with you, b*tch!"
"Hey there little mister, I’m dating your sister."
I'd tell a joke about how my mom was abusive, but I either forgot everything, or she just wasn't there.
Short girl: "How do you see up there?"
Tall guy: "Who said that?"
I spit my drink out and then ran away.
Hey, are you bored? Kick an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Me: Knock, knock.
Another person (OP): OP: Who's there? Me: Hatch. OP: Hatch who? Me: Bless you =) OP: But I didn't sneeze. Me: You just don't get a joke, do you?
Why have there been so many deaths around the world?
Trees and ropes.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Queen.
Queen who?
You don't know the queen? You're crazy!
You. Me. Gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie in our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer surrounded by fish.
Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy. The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight. Bare handed. Bare, naked? Oh, yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl and ride it into a Chuck E. Cheese. Dance Dance Revolution. Revolution? Overthrow the government? Uh, I think so. Next thing you know, I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then I turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out, which I didn't even know you could do. Then I smoked a joint, greened out. Then I turn into the sun. Uh oh! Looks like the meth is kicking in. aklfhaofhasfahfakh AAAAAAAAA afahfioahflkf AAAAA