Thereness jokes

Zoo

    • I went to the zoo the other day. The only animal there was a dog. It was a Shih-tzu (shit zoo).

  • 3

    • Name

    • There were these three men; their names were Shit, Shut up, and Manners. One day, they were riding in their car, and Shit fell out, so Manners went out to pick Shit up, and Shut up went to the police station.

    When he got there, the police officer said, "What's your name, son?" and Shut up said, "Shut up." The officer replies with, "Ummm...excuse me?!" and Shut up said, "Shut up!" and the officer said, "Boy, where are your manners?" and Shut up said, "Round the corner picking up Shit!"

  • 5

    • Brother

    • There were once three brothers, Shit, Shut up, and Manners. One day, Shit got hit by a car. Shut up went to find help at the local police station while Manners tried to help Shit.

    When Shut up got to the police station he says, "My brother has just been hit by a car."

    The policeman replied with, "OK then, first I need to know your name."

    "Shut up."

    "No, I need to know your name."

    "Shut up."

    "Excuse me, but where are your manners?"

    "Round the corner picking up shit."

  • 3

    • Matter

    • Why are there so many jokes about Chuck Norris, but not about Bruce Lee?

    Bruce Lee was no joking matter.

  • 2

    • Indian

    • There were three Indians that got kicked out of the tribe.

    One said, "Me find food," and he came back with a decent size rabbit. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see rabbit, me shoot rabbit, and rabbit fall down dead."

    The 2nd Indian, "Me find food." He came back with a good sized deer. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see deer, me shoot deer, deer fall down dead."

    The third Indian said, "Me find food." He came back crawling, missing a leg and an arm, and he was all cut up. The others asked what happened. He said, "Me see train, me shoot train, train no stop!"

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