Thereness jokes
Why is sex like math? You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there's no multiplying.
If there was someone selling drugs around here, we'd know.
My friend was pissed off with me. I was sniffing his sister's knickers. It was worse that they were still on her. It was worse the family were there. It made the rest of her funeral really awkward.
There once was a street named Chuck Norris. They had to change the name because no one crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
There was a recent football match between Ethiopia and Egypt.
Egypt 8, Ethiopia 0.
Why did Stephanie fall off the swing?
Because she has no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Not Stephanie!
Knock knock. Who's there? Broken pencil. Broken pencil who? Never mind, it was pointless!
Chuck Norris has been to Mars... that's why there are no signs of life there.
What happens if an Asian walks into a wall with a boner?
They hit their nose on the wall.
Why did Sally fall off the swings?
She had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite place to eat?
A: Schools because there is a wide variety of choices.
There are 5 cats on a boat, and 1 jumps off. How many are left?
Zero, they were copycats.
Did you hear about the fortune telling dwarf that escaped from prison?
Reports say there's a small medium at large!
Knock knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya who? Sorry, I prefer Google.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Daisy. Daisy who? Daisy me rollin', they hatin'!
Why did Sally fall off the swings?
Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally!
Voldemort: Knock, knock.
Harry Potter: Who's there?
Voldemort: You know.
Harry Potter: You know who?
Voldemort: Exactly!
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Heaven.
Heaven who?
Heaven fun over there?
OK, there are at least 3 pedophiles in your neighborhood.
But there are no pedophiles in my neighborhood; there are only three 10-year-old girls with juicy asses.
How many babies does it take to make dinner?
Three to four; there's not a lot of meat on them.