Thereness jokes

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly.

Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.

The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.

Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.

- That girl was hot. - She's my cousin!

Whenever you think back to 9/11 and realize there are 12 hours in front of us, why the f*ck didn't they warn us?

How can you make a orphans hand bleed?

Real them to clap until there parent come home.

Why is there bullying? They can handle it by themselves.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the idiot's house.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

The chicken.

"Doctor, there's a patient on line 1 that says he's invisible."

"Well, tell him I can't see him right now."

There was a person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

So, there were kids in the bus, and half of them were white, and the other half was black.

All the kids wanted to sit at the back, so the bus driver said to all the kids, "Stop fighting. From now on, everyone is now green." So, the bus driver said to all the kids, "Dark green go to the front, and light green at the back."

Knock, knock. Who's there? Fuck. Fuck who? What, are you kidding me? I just wanted to tell you a joke!

Where do dogs go when their tails fall off?

To the retail store.

Knock knock. Who's there? Broken pencil. Broken pencil who? Never mind, it's pointless!

Question: Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?

Answer: Because there was a... crack in it!!!! HAHAHAHAHA! :)

What’s the best thing about sex with 119 year olds? There are 100 of them.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Owl say.

Owl say who?

Yes, they do.

I will tell you a story. There was a fruit named Pear who was named Dyck. He one day met his friend Carrot, who was later killed after being stuck into some girl's vagina.

Pear then became very sadistic and no one loved him, and he became mentally fruit-pressed. One day he met a Banana named Harvey Weinstein, and they got married and had children who were all named Minion. Eventually, the rest of his family died, and Pear was left slowly rotting away. His last words were, "I have finally 'peared' the consequences of all my actions."

"Knock Knock!" "Who's there?" "It's Dave!"

"Dave who?"

Dave bursts into tears, realizing that his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

In the average room, there are about 2,894,638 items that Chuck Norris can use to kill you, including the room itself.

If you ever get cold, just stand in a corner. There's usually 90 degrees.

There are 30 cows in a field, 28 chickens. How many didn't?

A - 10

What did the knight say to his younger brother? "Good night."

You expected a silly pun there, didn't you? That's pretty rude. It makes light of the struggles of being a knight. Especially a good knight.