Them jokes
(True story) Today I was bringing some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “Oh, now they’re broken.”
And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”
Hey, people don't fly with suicide jokes.
In fact, they hang with them!
Why aren’t short people allowed to be mentors?
Because you can’t look up to them.
Yesterday, there was a blackout on my street.
So I sold them.
Neither of them respect boundaries.
What in the world jumps the highest? Emo kids, some of them are still in the air.
Why can't orphans ride a bike?
'Cause their parents won't follow them.
Some people are such treasures that you sometimes just wanna bury them.
Why are orphans so bad at dodgeball?
Because nobody misses them.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
What does a baby and a grenade have in common?
They both make noise after you throw them.
What part of "Another One Bites the Dust" do you sing to a disabled person to make fun of them? "I'm standing on my own two feet."
Why are friends good at dodgeball? Because no one misses them.
Why are orphans bad at basketball?
They haven't learned how to keep the ball with them.
Women are like towers, the man wants to bang them both.
I saw a kid crying in the corner. I asked them where their parents are. Man, I love working at an orphanage!
What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?
One of them is a domesticated pet.
How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?
Tell them their parents are waiting when they wake up.
My wife and I just decided we don't want to have children.
So if anyone wants them, our contact information is below.
Why did the orphan fall out of a tree?
They thought their parents would catch them.