Them jokes
(True story) Today I was bringing some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “Oh, now they’re broken.”
And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common? There used to be two of them, but now it's a sensitive subject.
Hey, people don't fly with suicide jokes.
In fact, they hang with them!
Yesterday, there was a blackout on my street.
So I sold them.
How did the Emo kid bag all the cheerleaders?
He hit them all when he started shooting his shot.
Memes
Reasons
If two blind people meet, one of them says: "Long time, no see!"
What is the difference between women and cars?
At least one of them retained their value after getting wrecked.
Why does Darth Vader always choke people?
Because he wants them to feel what his Sith Lord does to him in bed.
Why can't orphans ride a bike?
'Cause their parents won't follow them.
Some people are such treasures that you sometimes just wanna bury them.
Neither of them respect boundaries.
I saw a kid crying in the corner. I asked them where their parents are. Man, I love working at an orphanage!
What in the world jumps the highest? Emo kids, some of them are still in the air.
What's something a depressed person can do that a regular person can't?
The depressed person can scan themself.
Man 1: Hey, I heard you survived a school shooting. What was it like?
Man 2: People were screaming and running everywhere. I was only able to get a few of them.
An orphanage is like a horse rescue. You rescue them, rehabilitate them, then sell them for as much as possible.
Why does Michael Jackson like twenty-eight year olds?
'Cause there are twenty of them.
What part of "Another One Bites the Dust" do you sing to a disabled person to make fun of them? "I'm standing on my own two feet."
Why are orphans bad at basketball?
They haven't learned how to keep the ball with them.
Why are friends good at dodgeball? Because no one misses them.