That jokes

Yo mama

    • Yo mama was so fat that when she stepped on the scale, the scale said: "OOOWWWWW!!!! Get off me, you overweight bucket of lard."

    Boy

    • The boy was sexually frustrated that he couldn’t have sex with girls, so he fingered his female cat.

    That memes

    Constitution

    • Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do, and so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman, and child in this country is innocent, and that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!

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    • Creep

    • Does anyone know what's going on with all the creeps that joined and restart your school laptop to get everything unblocked?

    Depression

    • Hey you, the person who's scrolling, I know you might have depression and some feel they can't talk to anyone about it, so in the comments please, if you need to talk to others, if you comment about it and say you need to talk to someone, I promise you that I will talk to you. You are not alone, and even though it seems it won't change and get better, it will, I promise.

    Please no harsh comments toward each other.

    Baby

    • "Knock knock!"

    "Who's there?"

    "Baby!"

    "Baby who?"

    "Do you want to eat this baby that I have prepared?"

    "No thanks, I already ate."

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    • Cannibal

    • Will: Let's bring Hannibal a gift today!

    Beverly: Yeah, I bet he’d love that!

    Will: Yey!

    Beverly: What should we bring him?

    Will: *holds up a bucket and knife with an insane looking smile* Come in the bucket!

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    • Woman

    • A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine-year-old son in the closet.

    One day, the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet with her son. Inside the closet, the little boy says, “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” “Yes, it is,” the man replies. “You wanna buy a baseball?” the little boy asks. “No thanks,” the man replies. “I think you do want to buy a baseball,” the little extortionist continues. “OK. How much?” the man replies, after considering the position he was in. “Twenty-five dollars,” the little boy replies. “TWENTY-FIVE DOLLARS?!” the man repeats. “That’s awful expensive,” but because of the position he was in, agreed to the price.

    The following week, the lover is visiting the woman again when she hears a car in the driveway, and again places her lover in the closet with her little boy. “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” the boy starts off. “Yes, it is,” replies the man. “Wanna buy a baseball glove?” the little boy asks. “OK. How much?” the hiding lover responds, acknowledging his disadvantage. “Fifty dollars,” the boy replies, and the transaction is completed.

    The next weekend, the little boy’s father says, “Hey, son. Go get your ball and glove and we’ll play some catch.” “I can’t. I sold them,” replies the little boy. “How much did you get for them?” asks the father, expecting to hear the profit in terms of lizards and candy. “Seventy-five dollars,” the little boy says. "SEVENTY-FIVE DOLLARS?! That’s thievery! I’m taking you to the church right now. You must confess your sin and ask for forgiveness," the father explains as he hauls the child away.

    At the church, the little boy goes into the confessional, draws the curtain, sits down, and says “It’s dark in here, isn’t it?” “Don’t you start that crap in here,” the priest says.

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    • 9/11

    • A retired George W. Bush is eating a donut at 7/11 and looks at it. "I'm so happy I did that." A guy overhears the conversation and says, "You're happy you bought that donut? Oh haha, I would be too. I love donuts!" George W. Bush then says, "Oh hahaha, you caught me," and then says, "Oh hahaha, you must have heard me wrong. I said, I'm so happy I did 9/11."

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    • Insult

    • Blitz: "HOLD ON! You better move that pussy wagon right now, or I’m gonna..."

    Vortex: "You'll do what?"

    Blitz: "Or I'll... uh... uh, I- I'll call HR!"

    *Silence, then Verosika/me, Blitz, and Vortex bust into laughter. And then back to seriousness*

    Verosika/me: "Anyway, meet my new Hellhound... Vortex. Unlike you, he actually does his job well." *leaves and flips Blitz off* "Ta-ta fuck stain."

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    • Music

    • Watersharky Music Productions Presents As It Was by Harry Styles.

    Holdin' me back Gravity's holdin' me back I want you to hold out the palm of your hand Why don't we leave it at that?

    Nothin' to say When everything gets in the way Seems you cannot be replaced And I'm the one who will stay, oh-oh-oh

    In this world, it's just us You know it's not the same as it was In this world, it's just us You know it's not the same as it was As it was, as it was You know it's not the same

    Answer the phone "Harry, you're no good alone Why are you sitting at home on the floor? What kind of pills are you on?"

    Ringin' the bell And nobody's coming to help Your daddy lives by himself He just wants to know that you're well, oh-oh-oh

    In this world, it's just us You know it's not the same as it was In this world, it's just us You know it's not the same as it was As it was, as it was You know it's not the same

    Go home, get ahead, light-speed internet I don't wanna talk about the way that it was Leave America, two kids follow her I don't wanna talk about who's doin' it first.