That jokes
What did the Los Angeles Police do when George Floyd said that he could not breathe? They gave George Floyd two squirts of Zicam cold remedy inside his nose.
Yo momma's so fat that she plays pool with planets.
Keep smearing that make-up around your face, maybe you'll get somewhere with it.
Your hairline is so far back that the United States got a front row seat!
Yo mama so dumb that when she went to Starbucks, she thought she could buy a star.
Yo mama is so ugly that Satan started going to church!
Be grateful:
You're missing work today because in the past, someone cared enough to leave that banana peel on the stairs.
Teacher: What is your least favorite holiday?
Orphan: National Forgive Your Mom And Dad Day.
Teacher: Why is that your least favorite?
Orphan: Because I don't have any parents to forgive.
Teacher: *tries to hold back* HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
What did the mama nut say to her son?
“If I ever cashew doing that, I walnut be happy.”
A man goes to the doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world.
Doctor says: "Treatment is simple. The great clown - Pagliacci - is in town. Go see him. That should pick you up."
Man bursts into tears, says "But doctor... I am Pagliacci."
My friend put an action toy and called it Kobe and put it on a drone. I realized that my friend didn't know how to fly a drone.
Teacher: Where were you born?
Student: The highway.
Teacher: What do you mean?
Student: I don't know, my mom says that's where all the accidents happen.
Your Mom so fat that she went on to commit suicide, but the roof fell off.....
I just read in the news that tons of Americans are sending their old clothes to poor people in Africa.
Seems like a waste of time in my opinion. I've never seen an African with a 52 inch waist.
Today in math class we had to do an activity where we had to flip coins. The teacher said that we had to flip some coins, remove all of the heads, count them, and put the rest of the coins back in the cup and repeat until we had no coins left. I’m not sure what we were supposed to get out of that activity, but I got 15 dead bodies.
What do you call a bowling ball that falls from the sky and knocks down all the bowling pins?
An airstrike.
I have gathered intelligence regarding the Russian Forces that have been stalled in Ukraine for days. Apparently, they are installing rear view mirrors on their combat vehicles and tanks in order to see the battle at the front lines.
Me: "Hey, get my joke on that timeline."
Her: "No."
What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop.
Do you know the phrase "One man's trash is another man's treasure?"
That's a horrible thing to find out when you're adopted.