That Jokes

Like Markgeraldnasol and his Pokemon Jokes.

What do you call a killer that uses psycho powers?

Mr. Mime!

Your hairline is so long that Odell Beckham Jr. missed a catch and saw your hairline from a mile away!

When my mom said you have to listen to classical music at my new school, I had to listen to it twenty-four seven. After that, I sang the song [with] the wrong melody for my music teacher 😎

I find that a lot of butts CRACK me up.

The Blonde got a Ph.D.?

Yeah, like that would ever happen.

A man pushes a shopping cart full of bananas in a grocery store. Text above and below the image says: "That is the guy from the maths book who buys 50 bananas without a reason."

You're so short that you use a ladder to reach a dime.

Q: I'm a famous athlete and I've got a lot of fans.

A: Is that why I never see you sweat?

What do you call a German that is blind? A not-see.

What do you call a hippo that has been thrown in a pan?

Hippo-POT-amus!

So last week I gave my blind friend a cheese grater. The next two weeks he told me that was the most violent book he has ever read.

Gf: Babe, do you love me?

Bf: Count the stars and that's how much I love you.

Gf: But it's morning, sweetie...

Bf: Exactly.

Gf: :0, I'll take that as a no.

What do you call seagulls that fly over a bay? Bay-gulls.

Keep smearing that make-up around your face, maybe you'll get somewhere with it.

I heard that your forehead is so big that you could build a neighborhood on it.

My grandfather said that I was too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and cut him off life support.

Isn't it sad that orphans are only allowed self raising flour? Orphan-👁👄👁

What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?

A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.

Well on the positive side: the Mexicans will probably want to pay for, and build, that wall at this point! Maybe the Canadians as well; two free walls!