That jokes

What was the drug addict's favorite nursery rhyme?

I'm a little crack pot short and stout, put that crack pipe in my mouth, sell my body or sell my couch, get that lighter and smoke me out!

Do you know the phrase "One man's trash is another man's treasure"? Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out that you were adopted!

If Jesus told you to trust everyone, that must be why there are a lot of kidnappings.

Did you know that McDonald's made a Michael Jackson burger? It’s a 50-year-old piece of meat in a 12-year-old bun.

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  • Does anyone know what's going on with all the creeps that joined and restart your school laptop to get everything unblocked?

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    Some say under his helmet is another smaller helmet, and under that is another helmet, and under that is a poster of Miley Cyrus.

    Have you seen the Justin meme?

    Yeah, the ones that cracked at Fortnite?

    Just-in time for deez nuts.

    Bruh.

    But actually, it's a parody.

    Wait, actually?

    Parodiesnuts (pair of deez nuts).

    What's the code thing on Minecraft that decides the world generation?

    Seed?

    Seedeeznuts!

    Don't see why people say that babysitting a toddler is hard. You just grease the bathtub, put them inside with some food and drink, and go do your business. I guarantee you that they will still be there when you return.

    If you stay in the house, you might need to use sound cancelling headphones too, though.

    A guy goes ice fishing for the very first time. All of a sudden, he hears a voice. “There are no fish under the ice!”

    He ignores it and moves to another area, cuts a hole, and tosses his line in. Again, he hears the booming voice: “There are no fish under the ice!”

    He nervously looks up and asks, “Lord? Is that you?”

    “No, this is the rink manager!”

    I bet my friend $5 that he would drown in the lake.

    ... It was a bittersweet victory.

    What do you call a blonde in the freezer?

    Her parents named her Jessica, so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.