What does McDonald's and a paedophile have in common?
They both like sticking their meat in ten year olds
A man puts in ten jokes into a joke contest. He hopes that at least one will win. Sadly, no pun intended.
I recently saw a pun contest in NYC. The owners said there was a maximum of 10 puns that I could submit. I wrote 10 puns and submitted all of them in hopes that at least one would win--however, no pun in ten did.
Yo momma decided to go to KFC until she realized she had to share with her family, so she bought ten buckets and the cashier said, "Here is the receipt." Now yo momma got afraid of how much money she had to spend, despiting on how she spent more than Drake's net worth that he can even lend. She went back home seeing her family looking at her and the KFC, thinking that could be her rent, but the whole family dug into the food. By the second they see the plates empty and seeing the lazy mom steady, she ate so much she wasn't ready until she fell, which caused an earthquake, which made her go to jail, which caused her to be scary.
How many times do you tickle an octopus to get it to laugh?
Ten-tickles!
How many times do yo tickle a squid before it laughs???
TEN-TICKLES
I was finally released from jail a year after I beat up someone on New Year’s Eve.
Don’t blame me for being suspicious of an Arabian counting down from ten.
There were 25 cows, 28 chickens. How many didn't?
(Ten, if you count in base 13!)
Why is six scared of seven? Because 7 8 9. Then why was 10 scared? Because he was between 9/11
Man with cancer: How much time do I have left?
Doctor: Ten.
Man: Weeks? Months? Days?
Doctor: Nine, eight, seven...
I tried out some puns to make people laugh, but no pun in ten did.
What's the difference between a toaster and a ten-year-old Chinese girl? A Japanese soldier would regret sticking his d*ck into a toaster.
I'm the champion of this site. I fight with the ten rings and ten fists of the legendary Buddha.
Now for my joke...
Why does Peter Pan always fly?
Because he never lands.
What has ten children crying, naked, and screaming for their parents?
My big green pedo machine.
I find it difficult to count to ten in French: un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept.
I can't say the next one because I have a "huit" allergy.
What happens when there's ten people in one house and they all have to shit and there's one bathroom?
It's a motherfucking shitshow party!
Ur mom was so fat that even Jon Brower Minnoch was ten times less fat.
We gave Erik ten Hag 7-Up after Liverpool thrashed Man Utd 7-0. He said, "F**k you all!"
Two guys in a car get pulled over by a cop. The cop taps the window, and the window rolls down. "Good evening, gentlemen, we're looking for two pedophiles."
The guy quickly closes the window. Ten seconds later, he lowers it again and says, "Ok, we'll do it."
Ryan: Mother, if you had 10 cookies, and I took 4 away from you, how much do you have?
Mother: I will still have ten cookies, because I will not give any to you.
Ryan: What if I forcefully take 4 cookies away from you?
Mother: I will have 10 cookies and a dead body.
Ryan and his mother had cookies that day. Ryan took all 10 cookies. He was never seen again. R.I.P Ryan.
