I had a very long dream that I was eating the most juiciest tastiest meal I'd ever eaten in my life ten when I woke up my wife was gone.
Yesterday in my dream I ate a ten pound marshmallow, when I woke up my pillow was gone
There was the person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
My dad always told me I should sing tenor. Ten or twelve miles away
Man to woman: Would you sleep with me for one million dollars? Woman: Sure. Man: How about for ten dollars? Woman: What do you think I am? Man: We’ve already established what you are. All we’re doing is negotiating price.
Q: who are the fastest readers? A: twin tower victims they got 80 stories in ten seconds
So a doctor walks into the room with a dying patient. He looks the man up and down and says gravely: "I'm sorry, you only have ten left." The other man smiles nervously and asks, "T-ten what doc? Hours? Days? Weeks?" The doctor calmly looks at him. "Nine."
Doctor: you don't have long to live. 10... Patient: ten what? ten years, ten months? Doctor: 9... 8... 7...
A man has a terminal illness and isn't sure how long he has left to live, so he talks to his doctor. The man asks "How long am I going to live?" The doctor says "Depends, what time is it?" The doctor then looks at his watch and says"10" The man asks "Ten what?" Then the doctor keeps going"6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1"
How many dead children does it take to change the light in a basement?
More than ten, apparently.
Whats worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree?
One dead baby nailed to ten trees.
The Trump family are flying from New York to DC when Donald looks down on the cities below
Trump: I think I’ll throw a $1000 bill out the window and make some American happy Melania: Oh honey, why not throw ten $100 bills out the window and make ten Americans happy? Ivanka: Even better daddy, throw 100 ten dollar bills out the window and make 100 people happy Pilot: Why don’t you all jump out the window and make the whole country happy?
Person A: What do you call the dangly bit of an octopus?
Person B: Tentacles?
Person A: Ok *tickles person B ten times*
Guess what? I have a baby in ten trashcans.
My woman is a nine on a bad day, but she’ll be 10 on her birthday
If i had 10 dyno nuggies and Jamal tried to take one i would have ten dyno nuggies and Jamal's head
did u hear about the new german microwave? it has ten seats in it
pun enters the room and kills ten people.
pun in, ten dead
Kid: Dad where are you going
Dad: To get milk
TEN YEARS LATER
Kids friend: wheres your dad
Kid: he went to get milk but never came back
