Teen jokes
Emos love jumping for joy.
What keeps an emo kid from hitting the ground?
The rope.
What do pears and emo kids have in common?
They both be hanging.
Note to all moms of teens, keep a dog. That way, someone is excited to see you!
What do you call a teen wizard who just went through puberty?
Hairy Potter.
When the emo kid looks at you and says, "Fuck you," run!
Why are emo kids the best jumpers?
Because they never fall down.
What's a depressed kid's least favorite game?
Cut the rope.
What's an emo kid's favorite movie?
Suicide Squad.
I thought gender reveal parties were only for newborns, not for teenagers.
Yesterday I got detention because I said to the emo kid, "Come hang with us."
Yo mama so stupid that she tried to ride Ponyboy Curtis.
How does an emo kid compliment one another?
Like your cuts, G.
The emo tried to high five the tree, and it left him hanging.
What happened when the emo kid gave the tree a high five? It left him hanging.
What do emo kids and apples have in common?
They both hang off trees.
A young 38 year old happy Muslim migrant living in Sydney wants to wed a beautiful young bride. He asks the local Aussie the minimum age to wed his yet unchosen bride. "Eighteen," the Aussie says, sipping a beer. "She has to be Eighteen."
Okay, the Muslim man sighed, with disappointment and walks off. Next day he arrives with a 13 year old girl.
"Wtf are you doing?" Aussie says?
"You say this is okay," Muslim replied. "Fuck no, she must be at least Eighteen you sick bastard," says Aussie, flicking away his Winnie Blue cigarette. Muslim man leaves angrily.
Next day Happy Muslim settles on a 14 year old girl from Punchbowl to be his bride. Aussies jaw drops, "What is wrong with you mate?" asks Aussie.
Muslim man replies "You tell me to choose 'a teen', 'a teen', I chose a teen and now you come for my third and now fourth choice. Fuck you!"
Aussie: "Eighteen not 'a teen' you sick mongrel."
What do cutting boards and a suicidal teen's wrist have in common?
They both have cutting marks.
What jumps higher than a basketball player?
An emo kid, they never touch the ground.
What are the similarities between an American teen and an old Muslim man?
They both choose who they want.