Technology jokes
What’s one thing smarter than Stephen Hawking? His computer.
1) What was Techno's reaction when he died?
2) Where did all the orphans go?
PS: In case you don't get it, it's a pedophile joke, cuz he is one!
Your mom's so fat, the photo from last Christmas is still printing!
His wife shut off the internet.
I fell in love with my computer because it helps me Excel.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
Error.
Why do orphans get an iPhone X?
Because they have no home button.
What did the processor say when it was being overclocked? "Stop it! It hertz so much!"
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy?
Hot Wheels.
If you scanned my thigh, it would show up as a package of Oreos on the screen.
Your mom does not need the internet. She's already worldwide.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
[Link to YouTube video]
For Stephen Hawking, why is being drunk and having his power shut out the same?
He blacks out.
Hey! My name is Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
So I was looking through my pictures and I found a picture of a random kid that took a picture of his ugly face. It looked like someone that got hit by a car, then a bus, then a semi.
That’s what I get for not having a password on my iPad.
My cousin’s friend spelled “racist” wrong and when my cousin showed me, the first thing I said to my cousin’s friend is “Go to Grammarly. They REALLY teach you spelling.”
What is long and hard and full of seamen?
A submarine.
I've been sad recently that the Twin Towers aren't around, so I made the conclusion to build a time machine to watch it again.
Why couldn’t the orphan play Xbox? Because there was no home button.
I was joking about self-harm to my friend, and she told me to "CUT it out!" I couldn't even laugh.
When we were at the self-checkout, she started scanning my arms. I asked her what she was doing. She said, "Trying to see if it beeps, ya think I'd get it to work if I scanned your thighs?"
I said, "Nah, bro, you'd overload the system if you put it there."