Sweet jokes

BF: Babe, I have two questions.

GF: Ok, ask!

BF: Where have you been all my life?

GF: Aww, that's so sweet. And the second question?

BF: Can you please go back there?

Why did the plum put sugar under its pillow?

So it could have sweet dreams.

Why are they called s’mores?

Because you always want another one!

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet. And your mom is, too.

"Sweet victory" fans: Fuck the NFL. They should be disbanded!

Harvey Weinstein: I raped five girls, and the NFL was one of them.

BFF: Dude, come over to my house right now!

Me: What? No way, it's 2:58 AM.

BFF: But I just found my brother's secret stash of Oreos!

Me: I'll be over in 5 minutes.

"I work with animals," a man said on his Tinder date. "That's so sweet," she replies. "I love a man who works with animals. Where do you work?" "At the butcher shop!"

I went on a date last night and told my date I worked with animals every day.

She said, "Oh, how sweet. What do you do?" I said, "I'm a butcher."

What did the salt say to the vinegar during the sweet and sour dynasty?

"STUPID VINIGGER!"

Warning: if you don't like gummy bears, DO NOT READ.

Q: What do you call a Mexican gummy bear?

A: Delici-Oso

Hi guys, the prankster is back!

I was gone for a long time because of this bullying about a nice sweet girl named Gwen! So my 6th prank is on...

When I put some bad stuff in my sister's toothpaste bottle!

Okay, so I took some smelly mints from the jelly bean game! I had molded cheese jelly bean, molded milk, and worms jelly bean! Jelly bean tasting is this game where weird tasted jelly beans are in there, so I got some mints and put it there! Then next thing you knew was, my sassy ass sister had her breath smelling like a chimpanzee's buttock!

If you think vanilla and chocolate ice cream is just light and dark mode.

What do guns and gum have in common?

When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.

I drip when you take me in the mouth, what am I? Ice cream.

Is there a really annoying girl at your school and she's so fake? Well, say this:

Me: Hey, I have a nickname for you.

Her: Really? What?

Me: Sweet-in-low.

Her: Why?

Me: Because you're artificial.

Hi my sweet friends! This is for everyone who needs help right now :)

What is the biggest candy in the world?

Candy Borobudur.

What's a lesbian's favorite candy?

Licorice.

Is their [there] a doctor anywhere?

My mom has a few problems & those problems is [are] that my mom has big tits, fat ass & sweet pussy that needs attention. Help anyone.

My wife asked me the other day where I got so much candy. I said, "I always have a few Twix up my sleeve."