Superhero jokes
Iron Man dies.
If Iron Man and Quicksilver teamed up,
They would be alloys.
Knock knock. Hwoo's there? Far from home. Hwoo's far from home? Spider-Man.
They told me Avengers: Endgame was going to be 3 hours long, but honestly? I felt like it was over in a SNAP!
To you, Iron Man may seem cool or awesome, but to me, he is pretty ironic.
Why doesn't Batman need Robin as a wingman?
Because he has no problem robbin' your girl.
What do you call an orphan? Batman.
That awkward moment you try to relate to Batman by killing your parents.
Superman has been called to a huge house fire. Superman: "There you are ma'am, everyone out and all safe!" Mother: "But my children are still inside! You need to go back an--" Superman: "Ah fuck'em..."
What does a South African Batman wear? A cape.
What did Robin say to Batman when they were getting chicken?
Hahaha, I don't know.
What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile?
"Get in the Batmobile!"
Buh dum tish.
Superman was bored and wanted to go out. He called all his super friends, but they were all busy. He even calls Louis, but it's her time of the month.
He flies to the liquor store and buys some beer and gets drunk. As he is flying, he sees Wonder Woman naked on top of the roof. He starts thinking, "I will fly down and have sex with her sooooo fast," BURP, "that she won't know what happened," HICKUP.
He flies to her faster than the speed of light, BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG, and flies away with a smile. He passes out and crashed into a wall.
Wonder Woman jumps up and screams, "WHAT WAS THAT?"
The Invisible Man appears, holding his butt, and he gets off on Wonder Woman and says, "I don't know, but my butt hurts real bad."
Why is he called Ben 10? Because he is ten in long.
What's the difference between Batman and Robin?
Batman can go to the store without robbin'.
A man was forced off the Eiffel Tower, but he flew back up.
The executioners asked, "How'd you do that?"
He said, "I had magic chips. Here, take some."
They eat them, jump off, and die.
He asks for more chips, and the guy says, "You're a real a**hole when you're drunk, Superman!"
What is Mr. Incredible's biggest fan now called? Down Syndrome :)
Sixteen molecules of sodium walk into a bar. Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na BATMAN!!!
Kid: "I wish I could be like Batman!" Genie: "Wish granted!" When the kid gets home, both of his parents are dead.
Read this word:
Heroine.
Did you read it like the drug or like a female superhero?