Straight Jokes


what do you call a lazy gay? someone who comes straight out of the closet,and goes straight to the couch.

Kinda sus
in Sexuality

I bought a rainbow gun but for some reason it doesn’t shoot straight

in Blonde

3 blonde sisters die and are told by an angel that in order for them to go to heaven they have to pass all 100 steps. But each step has a joke , each joke gets funnier and funnier. And in order to pass them all, you can't laugh at any joke or else you go to hell. The blonde girls accept the offer. So the angel begins telling them the joke, one of the girls laughs at the 3rd step. The second blonde laugjhs halfway there. Finally, the last blonde was at the 100th step. The angel said ''this is the last step if you laugh you will go straight to hell with your sisters and if you don't you can pass. The blonde agrees and the angel starts to tell the joke, ''What do you ca..'' out of nowhere the blonde starts bursting out laughing. ''Why are you laughing I haven't even finished the joke yet''? The blonde replies '' I just got the first joke''.

sell farm
in Depression

if gay means happy then i am now straight

Not gay

Why do gays get bad grades?

They don't get straight a's

3 holes one bi

How do you find out if your kid is gay? Lock him in a closet and if he comes out his gay if not his dead straight.

in America

A straight man and a gay man are talking, the straight man says, "I'm wanted in 2 states for murder." and the gay man replies with, "oh, that sucks. I'm wanted in 13 for existing."

Mr. Dark Joke

I was digging in our garden when I found a chest completely full of gold coins. I was about to run straight home to tell my wife about it, but then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.


I went to school with a gay guy who was really smart, but he always got mad that he got straight A's instead of getting all the D's

COP: Are you high?

ME: If I was high, could I do this? *walks in a perfectly straight line*

COP: Wth he just walked off a cliff

everyone: so wait let me get this straight feminist want to cancel fathers day because it is offensive to single mothers

feminist: correct


random person

Three friends are in a hotel room in Soviet Russia. The first two men open a bottle of vodka, while the third is tired and goes straight to bed. He is unable to sleep however, as his increasingly drunk friends tell political jokes loudly.

After a while, the tired man gets frustrated and walks downstairs for a smoke. He stops in the lounge and asks the receptionist to bring tea to their room in five minutes.

The man walks back into the room, joins the table, leans towards a power outlet and speaks into it:

"Comrade major, we want some tea to room 62 please."

His friends laugh on the joke, until there is a knock on the door. The receptionist brings a teapot. His friends fall silent and pale, horrified of what they just witnessed. The party is dead, and the man goes to sleep.

After a good night's rest, the man wakes up, and notices his friends are gone. Surprised, he walks downstairs and asks the receptionist where they went.

The nervous receptionist whispers that KGB came and took them before dawn.

The man is horrified. He wonders why he was spared.

The receptionist responds:

"Well, comrade major did quite like your tea joke."

in Anti-jokes

All the lines on the LGBT flag are straight

in Kobe

NWA: Straight Outta Compton Kobe Bryant: Straight Outta the Helicopter


To my best friend, my brother is like a spider. She chose to kill him straight away. That's why she is my friend, after all! :D


What’s one thing that gay person scared at? A gay guy that’s straight!


Gays: I like men Straights: I like women Russia:Hole is hole


I asked what LGBTQ stands for and I couldn’t get straight answer😔

69 for 21
in Orphan

What can’t a gay person walk a trail because a gay person can’t walk on a straight line🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣