Stop

Stop jokes

Horse

  • So there was this girl and her horse would not stop following her, so she said, "Stop horsing around!"

    Get it? "Horse-ing."

    Fly

  • What did the human say to the fly when it was buzzing around the human's head?

    "Would you stop bugging me!"

    Son

  • Mom: Son, did you go to school?

    Son: What if I said yes?

    Mom: You are in school! *slap*

    Son: Mom, I am moving out and I am moving in with my girlfriend.

    Mom: You are with...? Please don't move out =(

    Son: Mom, stop! So what if I am moving out? I am moving into my girlfriend's home. It's only for school.

    Mom: Well, you are kicked out of my home!

    Son: Good.

    Mom: I am sad now. Why did he move out?

    If you like it, please commit down.

    Depression joke

  • Depression jokes are wrong, stop making them; they're cruel and nasty. So stop; people are feeling like they're hated when they read your orphan jokes or depression jokes, so PLEASE stop.

    Titty

  • So, I'm sitting here smacking on some cheese ball BBQ, my titties, and then I saw the most a shoe got shoveled all the way up my ass. I cried, then turned around and said, "MOTHERFUCKING COCK SUCK FUCKIN GAY ASS HOE SHOVIN SHOE'S UP MY ASS SON OF A BITCH!" Then turned around, punched the guy, got smacked in the face, went in for another punch, got smacked in the face, then people staring at me. I said, "WTF are you staring at?" I punched as hard as I can, then got knocked out. I thought this, "This isn't over motherfucker, I'm gonna find you and kill you." Next thing I knew, I was in the hospital. They told me, "Why tf were you fighting a stop sign?" I said, "What? You were fighting a motherfuckering stop sign?" I said, "Bitch, I ain't crazing yo head a stop sign son of a bitch fuck my pussy u must be high! hai es a bitch muhfuhcka"

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  • Dad

  • Please help, my dad is an addict. He won't stop, and he eats my food.

    Sometimes I think, should I kill him? But nah, he will go down with the others who did that too.

    Gun

  • Me: Hi, my name is...

    Bro: Hey guys! So who are you?

    Me: Hey, stop dude!

    Bro: How is it going, bro--

    Me: SHUT UP!

    Bro: Is that a gun?

    Me: *Pointing at bro*

    Bro: Dude, I'm...

    Me: *BANG* *BANG*

    Me: Finally, it's over.

    Rabbit

  • You know why Elmer Fudd always came out hunting rabbits in the woods? Because Bugs Bunny would not stop flirting with his girlfriend.

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  • Sister

  • So my sister was eating Now&Laters, and I continuously heard smacking sounds. So I told her, "Can you stop smacking? It's annoying." Then she said, "I can't, it's a juicy type of candy." So I said, "I can stop the candies from making that sound." Then she said, "How?" So I smacked her. :)

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  • Coffin

  • WARNING: READ THIS JOKE ALOUD!

    Was it the pills that stopped his coughing, or was it the coffin they carried him off in?

  • 1
  • Pedophilia

  • I was talking to my friend, and he said, "I lost my virginity to a girl, and then she stopped coming to school." And I said, "Probably because she was fired."

  • 1
  • Cancer

  • Stop making jokes about cancer... I might sound like a Karen, but it’s not fair... My mum died of cancer last month, and still I cry nearly every night 🙏🏻

    Husband

  • Wife is texting husband:

    "Honey, if I give you 300 dollars, will you stop being blind?"

    Husband: "seilghsielguG"

    Wife: "Seriously, David?"

    Husband: "fuweyadb"