The only problem being short and gay is that whenever I try to tell people I'm top in my relationship, they don't believe me because I'm shorter than the person I'm dating, like, WTF?
I hate it when ever I bring a girl over, my parents don't care, but when I bring one of my friends that's a boy, they're like, "Keep the door open," and I'm gay.
I hate it when people think I'm a boy because I have short hair. I mean, I'm gay, what do you expect?
Two people about to have sex realize they have no lube.
In their desperate, horny haste, they looked for the nearest "Downy" and asked it, "Speak into my hand."
Upon their return to the bed, they regretted it immediately because his dick just stayed down...
Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They wanted someone to call "daddy."
How can you tell if a Polish woman is on the rag? One of her socks is missing!
What danger does this put them in? Toxic Sock Syndrome!
How do you get 100 dead babies into a tub? Put them in the blender.
How do you get them out of the tub? Give mexicans tortilla chips and tell them theres salsa in the tub.
What is black and blue and really hates sex?
The six-year-old in my basement.
You
You
You're the cow.
The nearest approximation to a perpetuum mobile would be a Swabian chasing a Scot because of money.
(Swabians are the Scots of Germany regarding finances.)
A young girl was playing in the park with her mother when she asked the question, "Mummy, what's that building over there?" The mother looked at the prison, smiled, and said, "That's where the cotton pickers live."
Your mum's got big tits.
What do you call a black person swimming?
Cursed Minecraft image.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they all sit in the dark and cry.
There is a kid in my class who is allergic to peanuts. He says he's gay. He can't be though... he's allergic to nuts!
What's black and white and hard as nails? A nun on speed!
Why are the best used guns from France?
Because they have never been fired and they have only been dropped once.
"Penis equals power, pussy equals wussy."
How do you drown a Blonde? You put a scratch and sniff sticker in a pool.
Biggest chungest coming home, bitches!
