Steal jokes
I never wanted to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.
But when I got home, all the signs were there.
Last time I got caught stealing a calendar, I got 12 months.
What did the 90s rocker Space Engineer in multiplayer Miner yell at the Troll stealing his stuff?
"Hey! give me my Nickelback!"
If you had 10 chicken nuggets and Jimmy tried to steal one, what would you have?
10 chicken nuggets and a dead Jimmy.
What did Julius say when he saw a woman stealing an expensive chandelier?
“Guards! Seize her (Caesar)!”
All these African jokes aren't funny when you are a lover of Africa, how are there still Africans alive? Y'all are racist and may God forgive you. You know we're rich with natural resources, that's why y'all come to steal from us. Shame on you all!
Why did the cow steal an AK-47?
He was a mooslim.
Why is the thief so good at basketball? Because he can shoot, steal, and run.
When you steal the weird pet rock, so he pulls out his pet Glock.
A man was reported stealing a bar of soap from a corner store. The police concluded that he made a clean getaway.
If you steal a lottery ticket, is it considered Grand Theft Lotto?
My friend dared me to steal my other friend's watch. I tried, but failed. He really got me, dare.
The irony of metal jokes is pretty fun. But it leads to a lot of people stealing them.
How do you make antifreeze?
You steal her blanket.
Who do you call someone that steals his brother's girlfriend and [is] disowned by his whole family? Brandon.
Why did the baseball player get arrested? He tried to steal third.
Why do people not play Uno with Mexicans? Because they are always stealing the green cards.
Greg fucking steals toes!
What's the difference between an amateur thief and a professional thief?
The amateur thief says, "Give me all your money!" The professional thief says, "Sign here please."
Why was the DJ banned from the supermarket?
He was stealing all the samples.