Steal jokes
Who do you call someone that steals his brother's girlfriend and [is] disowned by his whole family? Brandon.
What is the difference between Michael Jackson and my uncle? Nothing, they both steal children.
My friend made this joke (so I’m going steal it). I’m surrounded by fat people, oh wait... it’s just one.
What did Julius say when he saw a woman stealing an expensive chandelier?
“Guards! Seize her (Caesar)!”
When you steal the weird pet rock, so he pulls out his pet Glock.
If Hillary and Biden got locked in a room together, all they would talk about is how to ruin America and make a plan to steal children.
A man in Saudi Arabia was caught stealing hand sanitiser.
The silver lining for him is that he will not need hand sanitiser anymore!
A bully walks up to a kid named Billy to insult him and steal his lunch money.
Later that night when he is at home, the bully’s father comes into his room to insult him and take the lunch money he stole.
The father walks down stair to check on his father in the living room. When he walks in, his father insults him and takes the lunch money.
The grandfather of the bully walks into the back yard and in the dark is Billy. The grandfather walks up to him and says “Where’s my money, you worthless old fart?”
I always use chloroform when stealing a child.
Fun fact! If you steal your sister's cat, she will be mad.
Me: Sister, stop stealing my stuff or I will make you feel bad.
Sister: No, I won't stop.
Me: Fine, I'm telling the world what you did.
Sister: What? You will see when I post it.
Sister: WHY DID YOU TELL THEM I PEED ON SANTA CLAUS WHEN I WAS 12 YEARS OLD?
Me: BECAUSE YOU DON ́T HAVE A LIFE.
Why did the 2 4s skip lunch? They already 8! Jahshshs.
And how did the pirate know that she saw land? She was shore of it! If u get it leave a like. Hahahahaha and which thing was heavier, a feather or steal? It's they way the same amount 🤣 😂 😅 😆 🙃 😄 🤣 😂 😅 😆 🙃 😄 🤣 😂 😅 😆 Lol like
What do you call a cow that can't milk?
A failure!
Greg fucking steals toes!
What's so wrong about Trump being in office?
He steals all the cats.
If you steal a lottery ticket, is it considered Grand Theft Lotto?
What do you call an Asian that steals cars? Tommy toke a motor.
What did the 90s rocker Space Engineer in multiplayer Miner yell at the Troll stealing his stuff?
"Hey! give me my Nickelback!"
What kind of person will steal Captain Hook's hook?
Answer: A hooker.
All these African jokes aren't funny when you are a lover of Africa, how are there still Africans alive? Y'all are racist and may God forgive you. You know we're rich with natural resources, that's why y'all come to steal from us. Shame on you all!