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Hitman

    • A hitman walks into a bar and tells the bartender, "I'm here to assassinate John Tucker." The bartender replies, "He’s in the restroom." The hitman goes inside the restroom and comes out after 1 hour.

    The bartender asks him, "Did you kill him?" The hitman replies with a sad face, “I asked him any last wishes and the guy asked me to allow him to finish his shit as he is half way in passing his stools, so I gave him my word that I would wait and so I waited for an hour, and when I asked him what’s taking him so long, he says he will not be able to finish because he is just getting started.”

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    • Condom

    • A woman is lying in bed after making love to her lover. After a moment, she starts to roll over, and in the process, she realizes that the spent condom is still inside her.

    Worried, she wakes up her lover. She asks, “What should we do about this?” To which he replies: “Who was it?”

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    • Theme Song

    • Chris Rock: Jada, I can't wait to see you in G.I. Jane 2!

    Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song starts playing:

    Will: "I got in one lil' fight about my wife's lost hair, she said, 'Will, if you don't do something I'm gonna have an affair!'" 😂😂😂

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    • Start memes

    Mama

    • Ur mama so fat that when she went to the ocean, all the whales started singing, "We are family," even knowing your fatter than me.

    Mom

    • Why is pounding your mom like playing video games?

    Because once you start, you just can’t stop until you win!

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    • Hole

    • I went to the bathroom and into a stall to see a hole in the wall. It reminded me of "The Lickable Wallpaper" from "Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory." I jokingly started licking. Though, the carrot tasted musky and kinda wrinkly.

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    • Club

    • Hi guys, I am starting a Gwen funny club. If you wanna join, then just type so here. Hope you have fun!

    Oh, and also can be a Gwen name club for Gwens only!

    Baiter

    • If you start at a bait shop, you're an amateur baiter, but once you achieve the highest level, you become a master baiter. Now buy a shrimp boat and become a master baiter on a shrimp boat.

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    • Band

    • So my brother said we should start a band, and I said I already had a band. So I gave him my band and he said he was talking about music, and I said, "Well, I do have a trum-bone ;)"

    Papa

    • Girl (on thirteenth birthday): Ma, why did papa leave?

    Mother: Well, it started exactly 1 year and 189 days ago...

    Toilet

    • Fat jokes and mom jokes😂

    1. So fat when she sat on the toilet, she said, "A B C D E F G, get your fat ass off me."

    2. So fat, your dad and her were in bed and tried to kiss. He’d have to slap her belly and ride the third wave up.

    3. Yo mama so fat that when she went to Japan in a green bikini, they all started yelling, "Godzilla, Godzilla."

    4. Your mama’s so fat when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

    5. Bill was so fat when he stepped on the scale, it said "to be continued."

    6. Yo mama so fat, she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.

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