I went to the store because I had to go to school to run up downstairs because my phone started calling me because I was playing Mario Kart on my kitchen sink's baby grandma, like if you cry every time.
What did the star say? It's Star Trek.
"Joe Mama is very cool. Sweet Home Alabama starts."
Start a RATIO chain.
Guy on Fortnite: "Ima sleep with your mom lmao."
Orphan: Starts crying.
Hey guys, starting tomorrow, I will put one letter of the "doin your mom" song every day. Can I finish the song?
Also, I might be in Fortnite, hehehehehe.
Hi guys, I am starting a Gwen funny club. If you wanna join, then just type so here. Hope you have fun!
Oh, and also can be a Gwen name club for Gwens only!
What did the tree do when the bank closed?
It started its own branch.
I saw a kid sitting on the side and asked if he was an orphan, “what gave me away?” “Well, your parents, for a start.”
The teacher made us present a slideshow to introduce ourselves.
Mine is bright and colorful with music. It was so good that a kid started dancing!
If a dog is white with black spots, then it is 90% great and 10% guilty because it half way starts crimes and is a mistake to the world and is punished by the white dogs that are full white and not mixed colors.
Your hairline is so far back, your barber didn't know where to start.
I beat up a failed musician until he started crying.
I thought a few hits would cheer him up!
I'm dyslexic. My sister was reading, "What's the book?" I asked. She showed me the cover. "You reading 'The Scared Bull'?" I asked. She started laughing. "No, 'The Sacred Bull'!"
Mbu some guys look financially stable until you start dating them... Mbu wait I see how this week goes...🤔
Yo mama so fat that when she sits down, global warming starts.
When your mum went to the UK and wore a yellow jacket, everyone started yelling "Taxi! Taxi!"
Must be heartwrenching for a loyal husband to watch his wife dry shagging me on the living room carpet.
I mean, once she started, she couldn't get enough.
One time a crow saw a peacock and then wanted to be like a peacock, so he picked up peacock feathers and then wore them.
Then he starts walking and everybody thinks he's strange, and then his friends are not his friends anymore, and then after that he says, "Friends, please be my friends again. I'm sorry, I will be the way I am."
I made this up.
I was watching a school baseball game, and I was yelling at a kid to take it home. He took the bat and threw it, and then ran away. I asked the teacher/coach what the problem was, and he said the kid was an orphan, and I started laughing so hard.
Later that night, I wondered where he stormed off to after he threw the bat, and I thought to myself, "Not home."
