Start jokes
I was at school today, and one of my friends said after a test, "Man, that was hard." After that, I started laughing and I said, "That's what she said."
Start a RATIO chain.
Your mother is so fat, she actually went on a diet and started exercising, and I hear she's doing quite well now.
You when you face the boss the first time: :)
You when Dark Souls boss music starts playing on the second phase: :(
You when you ask why do you hear boss music: <(
You when the boss goes straight to his final phase after 1 hit:
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My friend died. Me and my other bestie start singing the coffin song. My bestie in the coffin, why are you not sad? Why are you still alive?
For some reason, people make fun of my name because it rhymes with something that starts with an F.
We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class.
I started playing the Angry Birds theme song. That didn't fly well with people, the teacher yelled at me like a bomb, and I landed on the ground.
The only reason communism started was because God looked at your face.
What’s a 5 letter word that starts with a ‘P’ that girls love to get their hands on? 😏
I've started playing the triangle for a reggae band. It's pretty casual.
I just stand at the back and ting.
DB: I'm the only shotgun with more than 1 barrel!
Lancaster: Are you sure about that?
DB: huh?
Lancaster: I have 4 barrels!
DB: WHAT!?
Penta Barrel: I got 5!
DB: *insert becoming uncanny*
Dual Hexagon shotgun: I got 12!
The others: HOW!?
*and that's how an argument started.*
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Knock knock.
WHO'S THERE?
*Starts putting up hand signs.*
I couldn't find my cat, and then my pillow started meowing.
Yo momma so fat, I asked her to save me a seat, so she sat down and she saved 10, and one by one the legs started popping off.
When you wear a big hat and your butt starts to splat diarrhea!
What state starts with an "a a lama"?
An African man was walking in New York when he saw a sign that said, "Watch out for children."
He started laughing hysterically, then a white man asked him, "Why are you laughing?"
He said, "In Africa, they would never put up a sign like that."
What did the star say? It's Star Trek.
I went to the store because I had to go to school to run up downstairs because my phone started calling me because I was playing Mario Kart on my kitchen sink's baby grandma, like if you cry every time.
Guy on Fortnite: "Ima sleep with your mom lmao."
Orphan: Starts crying.