Start jokes

I saw a kid sitting on the side and asked if he was an orphan, “what gave me away?” “Well, your parents, for a start.”

I'm dyslexic. My sister was reading, "What's the book?" I asked. She showed me the cover. "You reading 'The Scared Bull'?" I asked. She started laughing. "No, 'The Sacred Bull'!"

Yo mama so fat that when she sits down, global warming starts.

Who is going to start the robot takeover? Me.

My friend died. Me and my other bestie start singing the coffin song. My bestie in the coffin, why are you not sad? Why are you still alive?

I've started playing the triangle for a reggae band. It's pretty casual.

I just stand at the back and ting.

We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class.

I started playing the Angry Birds theme song. That didn't fly well with people, the teacher yelled at me like a bomb, and I landed on the ground.

For some reason, people make fun of my name because it rhymes with something that starts with an F.

What did the star say? It's Star Trek.

I’m part of the anti anime association, but I’m starting to like anime. What do I do?

And for the joke: What do you call a dog with no back legs and a pair of metal balls? Sparky.

Yo momma so fat, I asked her to save me a seat, so she sat down and she saved 10, and one by one the legs started popping off.

When you wear a big hat and your butt starts to splat diarrhea!

What state starts with an "a a lama"?

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Knock knock.

WHO'S THERE?

*Starts putting up hand signs.*

I was at school today, and one of my friends said after a test, "Man, that was hard." After that, I started laughing and I said, "That's what she said."

Your mother is so fat, she actually went on a diet and started exercising, and I hear she's doing quite well now.

I couldn't find my cat, and then my pillow started meowing.

You when you face the boss the first time: :)

You when Dark Souls boss music starts playing on the second phase: :(

You when you ask why do you hear boss music: <(

You when the boss goes straight to his final phase after 1 hit:

. --------

DB: I'm the only shotgun with more than 1 barrel!

Lancaster: Are you sure about that?

DB: huh?

Lancaster: I have 4 barrels!

DB: WHAT!?

Penta Barrel: I got 5!

DB: *insert becoming uncanny*

Dual Hexagon shotgun: I got 12!

The others: HOW!?

*and that's how an argument started.*

An African man was walking in New York when he saw a sign that said, "Watch out for children."

He started laughing hysterically, then a white man asked him, "Why are you laughing?"

He said, "In Africa, they would never put up a sign like that."