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Orphanage

  • I saw a little kid crying today. I asked where his parents were, and he started to cry more. I left the orphanage to get some milk after that.

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    Magician

  • Two magicians were in a competition. The first one did magic, and the second started counting down, "3, 2," but before he said the last number, he 1.

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    Poker

  • Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.

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  • Cow

  • My joke: You have to guess, answers come at 3:00. Why did the cow jump into space?

    Hint... it smelled its favorite food 🍱 and saw its future!

    That hint was technically the whole answer. Can you guess in 3 hours? Lol, I will be posting every time, and my giveaway starts at 5:00: my mega fly ride bat dragon 🐉 and five jungle eggs.

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    Mama

  • Yo mama is so slow, when she stepped on the highway they had to order a crane to come move her from starting traffic.

    Orphan

  • I once saw an orphan... I decided to ask them a simple question... "Hey! Where is your family?"

    They didn't reply.

    I kept asking them. They started crying. I started laughing. They ran away...

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    Phone

  • I dropped my phone the other day when a guy picked up my phone and started to put it in his pocket.

    I said, "Hey, that's my phone," and he said, "First of all, my name isn't 'Hey', it's Jay. Second of all, it's an iPhone, not a 'myPhone'. Get it right."

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  • Light Bulb

  • Tim and Tom were at work. Tim said, "I'm sick of this. I'm going to act like an idiot to get sent home." So Tim was on the roof saying, "I am a light bulb!" The boss walked in and said, "Tim, go home, you're acting like a dick!" Then Tom started packing up and Tim said, "Tom, why are you packing up?" Tom says, "I can't work in the fucking dark, can I?"

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