What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? I don’t know I was too busy wanking
There are some sounds that everyone loves... - Shoes on gravel. - Crackling of fire. - The snapping necks of those who think they can disrespect you. - Cats purring.
What do you call a mushroom that makes music? - a decomposer
A drum rolled down a hill. Ba-dum tsssh!
The judge asked me, "How does 5 to 10 years sound?"
I said, "Sexy."
Bad cows, bad cows, whatcha gonna moo?!
How do you make a cat sound like a dog?
You set it on fire- then it goes WOOF!
It's funny how Stephen hawking sounds like Stephen walking or Stephen talking but he can't do any of those things
People with down syndrome have a specific skill only they have, they can give a blow job and talk to you while sounding exactly the same.
Good sex sounds like a white man walking across the street with flip-flops on.
What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?
Unnecessary.
What happens when Stephen hawking dies? The windows shutdown sound plays.
What sound does a 747 make when it bounces?
Boeing boeing boeing.
Why can't humans hear a dog whistle? -- Because dogs can't whistle.
My girlfriend accused me of cheating. I told her she was starting to sound like my wife.
What is a pirate's favorite letter?
You'd think it'd be R, but really his heart will always belong to the C.
What is orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.
