Someone jokes

When your friend gets involved with someone, it affects the friendship. Whenever a friend of mine has a new girlfriend, we should say I looked like the person you used to know, but I've been modified to survive in this relationship. If we have an argument and she's there, I might disagree with you; I'd rather continue to see her naked.

How does a rapper greet someone on a cold day?

"Yo, is the temperature Ice Cube, or Vanilla Ice?"

If someone has a hyperfixation with drawing and playing, does that mean they are on the "artism" spectrum?

What do you call someone in a wheelchair with a gun? A rxd.

What did Michael Scott say to someone when he passed a plate of vegetables?

Boom! Roasted!

What do you call someone who kisses primary school kids?

Joshua Metcalfe

So I was looking through my pictures and I found a picture of a random kid that took a picture of his ugly face. It looked like someone that got hit by a car, then a bus, then a semi.

That’s what I get for not having a password on my iPad.

When someone falls, you say to them, "I remember when I started to learn to walk."

A blind woman told her husband someone is coming. He asks how do you know, you can't see. She replies, "I can taste it."

I was trying to tell some people here to stop, but then I found out that the S was covered in blood from me assaulting someone.

I remember locking my door, but then I went downstairs to hear someone say, "I'm inside your home." I said, "GTFO my house, BICH!"

I read the Brothers Grimm books, then I see a black figure reaping about.

I realized someone has died, but I don't do anything about it. I continue to read, and that's when I realized that I was one of the characters, in which at the end, dies.

One time Little Johnny saw someone in his yard tying a rope to a tree, and he moved the stool and the tree broke. Little Johnny screamed, "HAHA! You're skinny enough to break the tree!"

If every time someone faints when they see your face and I get 1 cent, I would be a trillionaire.

One day, someone's ex was going to the kitchen to get something to eat, and her ex-boyfriend was there and gave her an apple. Next minute, she had chlamydia. What did the boyfriend do?

Why did the orphan finally go to church? So they could call someone "father."

You know somebody has a fat ass when someone is standing between you and them, and all you can focus on is that trunk.

Hello, I'm Ariana. I'm looking for someone. Anyone wanna date me?

Ariana

There has to be someone that hates watersharky. He curses at you if you say one thing about his friends or him. He just is mean and needs to leave.

Hello.

Anyone does online dating and needs someone? HERE I am!