Someone Jokes

What did Michael Scott say to someone when he passed a plate of vegetables?

Boom! Roasted!

What do you call someone in a wheelchair with a gun? A rxd.

I read the Brothers Grimm books, then I see a black figure reaping about.

I realized someone has died, but I don't do anything about it. I continue to read, and that's when I realized that I was one of the characters, in which at the end, dies.

You know somebody has a fat ass when someone is standing between you and them, and all you can focus on is that trunk.

Hello, I'm Ariana. I'm looking for someone. Anyone wanna date me?

Ariana

There has to be someone that hates watersharky. He curses at you if you say one thing about his friends or him. He just is mean and needs to leave.

Hello.

Anyone does online dating and needs someone? HERE I am!

Why did the orphan finally go to church? So they could call someone "father."

Someone asks a question: Who? Who asked? Boom, you"re done xxx.

What is a fruit's favorite way to call someone?

WhatsApple.

What do you call someone who is half a Jew?

Jew-ish.

So I was looking through my pictures and I found a picture of a random kid that took a picture of his ugly face. It looked like someone that got hit by a car, then a bus, then a semi.

That’s what I get for not having a password on my iPad.

Why did Stephen Hawking die?

Someone unplugged the WiFi router.

What does Bill Cosby and someone eating at McDonald's have in common?

They're both mc lovin' what they're eating.

What do you call someone who kisses primary school kids?

Joshua Metcalfe

When someone falls, you say to them, "I remember when I started to learn to walk."

Yo momma so stupid that someone said, "You're not that wealthy," and she went to a doctor.

I hate it when I don’t understand someone.

How does a rapper greet someone on a cold day?

"Yo, is the temperature Ice Cube, or Vanilla Ice?"

Hey, I’m George, and this is how to figure out if someone is a psychopath.

Go into someone’s search history, and find “Cuphead ship fanfic”.

Hey George, why do you have Russia x America countryhumans?