Society jokes
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple gets picked.
Why did the disabled kid cross the road?
(Why?)
He can't.
I never understood school shooting jokes.
I guess they were aimed at younger audiences.
How do you give an "Alabama Girl" a nice compliment?
Answer: You say to her, "Hey, NICE TOOTH!"
Friends, gather here.
Samantha, Josephine, Stevie, Jess, Alice, and Alex.
A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom.
She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you."
She then wrote a note saying, "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, Blonde."
The blonde then taped the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.
The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow Blonde?"
Why can’t orphans go to a family restaurant?
Because there’s no family.
What’s the difference between Santa and an orphan? Nothing; they don’t have parents.
Why can an orphan never get picked up?
Because the white van did not come that day. HAHA BIG LOL
What's a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross country.
Women say their baby daddies are trash like... woman, didn't he impregnate you and didn't he win your heart? I mean, he's not trash, you are!
What do you call a chomo on the road? Roadkill.
Why can’t Chinese orphans play baseball?
They cannot run home.
Would you steal 20 dollars from a stupid 6 year old kid with Down syndrome who can't talk and make ah ah ah noises, or get one dollar for saying the N word?
If the UK is 6 hours ahead of us, why didn't they just warn us about 9/11?
Two nuns in a bath.
A priest, a pedo, and a rapist walk into a bar and that's just the first guy.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One of them gets picked up.
How do you know you’re at a gay church?
Half the congregation is kneeling.
My birthday's on September 11th, I'm gonna turn the fuck up and throw a banger! Then rub my tits in birthday cake frosting!!! WOOOOOOOOO!