Society jokes
Why can't orphans walk through doors?
Because they don't have a house to walk into.
Why can’t Americans play chess?
They lost 2 towers.
Why don’t Mexicans have sex education and a driver’s education on the same day?
Because the donkey gets tired.
Imagine everyone being hoes.
In America, mom births you.
In Soviet Russia, you birth mom.
I have more chin than the Chinese phone book.
What does an orphan not have in common with criminals?
Criminals are wanted.
Why do orphans love foster homes?
Because they actually have a home.
Hi, welcome to Dave's Orphanage, you make 'em, we take 'em!
Hippity Hoppity, women are my property.
Bippity Boppity, get the f*ck off my property!
What do a blind person and an orphan have in common?
They both cannot see their family.
Science flew us to the moon.
Religion flew us into two skyscrapers.
There was an exam music quiz question about Gary Glitter. Now, if there's anyone you don't want to associate with the phrase "shh, turn over, you've got an hour," it's him.
Shit, my bad. I should leave him alone, he just wants to settle down and have kids.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home plate is.
Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom
Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom
Doin' doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom
You know we straight with doin' your mom
Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom
Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom
Doin' doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom
You know we straight with doin' your mom
I’m doin' your mom. Yes yours!
I first saw her in the Wal-Mart pickin' out your drawers.
Big Dolly Parton hair like an 80s prom queen
But her ass was lookin' good all up in those mom-jeans.
I approached her in the checkout line, and said yo baby wassup?
She had two gallons of milk, and I was starin' at her jugs.
Five minutes later she agreed to get with me
So we went and rocked the minivan like Giggity. Giggity. Giggity.
I was ridin' your mom like she was Mario Kart.
I gave her a lift back to her crib cause her car wouldn’t start.
She invited me in the house, and we started makin' out again.
How many times I tap that ass? OVER 9000!
Yeah. She called me Pledge cause I knocked the dust off it.
She later made me a sandwich and she cut the crust off it.
Cause she knows how I like it, and that I’m a little young
To be in the bed, butt-naked doin' your mom.
Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom
Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom
Doin' doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom
You know we straight with doin' your mom
I would never slap a woman, then I’d be destroying property.
I can't stand disability jokes.
Why do most orphans become prostitutes?
“Because they always wanted a daddy.”
Women be like men are trash, [but] forgets women raised those men.
My teacher made us watch a movie about the struggles of being an overweight person in this day and age.
It was really heavy on me.