I met an orphan with a dog yesterday. I chose the dog.
Society Jokes
Why can't an orphan go to a family reunion?
It has no family.
Why did Orphan become famous?
Because he didn't need parent permission.
Genders are a lot like the Twin Towers.
There used to be two of them, now it's a sensitive subject.
Why do orphans love baseball?
Because it gives them a home to run to.
What's the difference between an escaped prisoner and an orphan?
Only one is wanted.
Did you know victims of 9/11 are fast readers?
They went down 100 stories in 4 seconds.
Have you ever walked into Helen Keller’s house?
She has.
Have you ever seen that weird ad that pops up at the bottom: sexy Russian babes looking for men older than 30, and they're 18, so is it a reverse pedo? Oh well.
Why can't orphans become famous?
Because it will become easier for Technoblade to track them down.
Friend: You're adopted.
Orphan: At least I was chosen!
Friend: At least I was kept.
Q: Name a murderer?
A: Jews: Hitler. Russians: Stalin. Chinese: Mao. Americans: Bin Laden. Aborted fetus: My mom.
Why did the student cannibal rush to the cafeteria?
He wanted to eat ahead of the others.
Any food an orphan has is a family-sized meal.
This ole boy that's locked up called his ole lady and got into it with her, and she said, "Well, fuck you, I don't need you no more anyway. I got 2 or 3 guys out here wanting me and trying to fuck me."
He said, "Well, honey, that's the least of my worries. I got 10 or 12 guys in here tryin' to fuck me."
Why do your orphans not drink beer?
Because last time they did, he went to suck some dudes' toes, then he tried to take him to his parents, but I guess that never happened.
A man is being sued for raping a deaf girl. The judge, showing his pinky:
"You should be ashamed, man, your conscience is even smaller than that!"
The girl, showing her arm:
"Mhhhmmhmm, mhhmhm!"
P1: What's the difference between a kid and a hooker?
P2: I don't know.
P1: Wow, you sick fuck!
Why do orphans cry?
Because they got no family.
What's the one school event that orphans don't go to?
Parents' evening.