Society jokes
A straight man and a gay man are talking. The straight man says, "I'm wanted in 2 states for murder." and the gay man replies with, "Oh, that sucks. I'm wanted in 13 for existing."
What do you call a genderless child?
It's not a mister, it's not a misses, I'm more for a mystery.
What do you call an unemployed Rastafarian?
Jah Bless.
I tried kidnapping a kid today and told him I was his dad's friend and I would take him home. He just curled up into a ball and started crying. Kidnapping must be easy.
Me and my friends were having a party the other day when some bitch came bitching about the noise. Thankfully, she was hot and had a nice ass, so it was enjoyable raping her.
The next day when I woke up, I found her body only half eaten. Her lower body was still intact, so I went for seconds to fuck off the hangover. Then I had breakfast. Her ass tasted good with some ketchup.
I asked a kid where their parents were...
Lol
Monster: “I will devour your family.”
Orphan: “Oh.”
What's black and grey and red all over?
A dead r******.
Hispanic and Latino people be like, "No more immigrants!" Like, dude, aren't you an immigrant?
If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
What do you call a protest that gets crowded?
Human trafficking.
What did the orphan say to the adopter?
Nothing, he just stared.
You're so fat, you have more chins than a fat Chinese with heaps of chins!
Who needs Singles Day when you're single for the rest of your life!
I don't see why women are complaining about the glass ceiling. I mean, if they reach high enough, they can clean it...
What is red, white, and blue all over?
A dead cop.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
TIL Ariana Grande is actually a pop singer.
I thought it was a fancy coffee for white supremacists.
What do you call a blind German?
A Nazi/Nattzee.
Why were the Twin Towers upset? Because they ordered pepperoni, yet plane arrived!!!