Society jokes
How can you make a woman scream your name when you have sex with her?
Change your name to "Rape."
How does a cannibal like his meat?
Human.
What do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.
Yo mama so fat, that’s why people don’t want to marry her, except for fat guys.
So, there is this button. There's a 50% chance you get a million dollars. There's a 50% chance that you turn into a turtle. Make them press the button, and if they give the money, you just push the orphan over, take their money, and run away because who are they going to tell? Their parents?
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
A blind man walked into a fish market and said... "Hello, ladies!"
Why do orphans like to play Minecraft?
Because they like to have a home.
Why do orphans like Monopoly?
To cry about the money they can’t earn in real life.
Are you an orphanage?
Why?
Because I wanna put my kids in you.
What's the difference between orphans and dogs?
Dogs get adopted.
Why did the Asian parents have an Asian baby?
Two wongs don't make a white.
Family feud after finding out about Alabama.
What's the difference between your dad and the mailman? Nothing.
Why can't orphans have sex? Because they have no one to call "daddy."
If you're a cat person, never let hungry Chinese into your house. They might just have a snack.
What did the emo say to the popular kid?
"Go fuck yourself for thinking all emos cut because they don't... y'know, for a matter of fact, fuck all you guys..."
Why couldn't an orphan have an iPhone 6? He couldn't find the home button.
Am I considered a cannibal because I told my mom that Grandma's ashes were sugar?
Friends, gather here.
Samantha, Josephine, Stevie, Jess, Alice, and Alex.