What's the difference between a Palestinian and a redneck?
At least the redneck was drunk when he married his cousin.
A child, molester, and priest walk into a bar.
He orders a drink.
What's the most embarrassing thing about locking your keys in the car outside a pregnancy care center?
Having to go inside and ask for a coat hanger.
What's the difference between child abuse and abandonment?
The abused ones are forced to listen while being abused, while abandoned kids cry because they don't have parents anymore.
How do you start a school shooting at a black school?
Call the cops.
If two blind people meet, one of them says: "Long time, no see!"
What do you call a group of black men hanging from a tree?
Alabama wind chimes.
Normally the reason you don't get a knife when you ask for one is because the person you asked is emo.
What do you call an Asian who gets a B?
It's not a B-sian.
Dead.
I think it’s dumb that people say a woman belongs in the kitchen.
How else is the rest of the house going to get cleaned?
I would never slap a woman, then I’d be destroying property.
What does a cannibal do after eating its vegetables?
Sells the wheelchair.
What’s worse than banging your sister?
Having to wear your dad’s wedding ring.
I was thrown out of the charity food kitchen on my first night of volunteering.
All I said was, "Hurry up, some of us got homes to go to..."
If the UK is 6 hours ahead of us, why didn't they just warn us about 9/11?
COVID is like fashion...
We started hearing about it in Italy...
Became popular in LA and NYC...
Florida ignored it...
And it was all made in China in the end.
Osama Bin Laden, Josef Stalin, and Hitler are robbing a bank, who do the cops shoot first?
A black guy.
There is a lot of difference between a man and a woman saying, "I went through a whole box of tissues watching that movie."
Cheap oil, no immigration, and no school shootings.
Corona did what Trump promised.
Women: “Men used to go to war, now they go to clubs.”
Men: “Women used to fear their nudes getting leaked, now it’s $3.99.”
