What does an autistic kid and a loaf of bread have in common?
They both have special needs.
Society Jokes
A 10 year old girl reported to her friends that her 16 year old male babysitter was touching her inappropriately. He quickly lost his job as a babysitter.
A 10 year old boy reported to his friends that his 16 year old female babysitter was touching him inappropriately. She quickly became the most popular babysitter in town amongst boys.
How do you ground a Gen Z?
Make them go outside and socialize.
There are 3 Genders.
1: Man
2: Woman
3: Mentally ill.
What do orphans do at parent teacher meetings?
What happens when the orphan at school gets sent home?
What’s the worst part about a dead prostitute?
You end up doing all the work.
Why are obese jokes so offensive?
Because fat people have enough on their plate.
What did the blonde say when asked if her turn signal worked?
“Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no, yes, no.”
Why are Indian people bad at Monopoly?
Because whenever they hit the corner, they build a shop.
What do you call a religious drug addict?
A crystal methodist.
One day, Jim saw a kid sitting on the curb dressed in rags. He asked if he was an orphan.
The kid said, “Yeah, what gave me away?”
Jim said, “I don’t see any parents.”
What’s the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
Why do Arabs hate chess?
Because the queen is allowed to move freely.
I know 5 fat people; you're 4 of them.
An old professor’s class used to begin with a dirty joke.
Following one particularly vulgar joke, the girls in the class decided to walk out the next time he began.
When the professor learned of this planned protest, he came in the next morning and said, “Good morning, class. Did you hear about the scarcity of whores in Newfoundland?”
With that, all the women stood up and headed for the door.
“Wait, ladies,” called the professor, “The boat doesn’t leave until tomorrow!”
I told my mom I'm happy and she said: "I didn't know you were gay."
Texter 1: You know People treat me like a god.
Texter 2: How?
Texter 1: They ignore my existence unless they need something.
What was the scariest thing Helen Keller ever read?
The waffle iron.
Why don't Indians play baseball?
Every time they reach a corner, they make a shop.
