What do you call a 96-year-old who can still masturbate?
Miracle Whip.
Friend: My bike doesn't have a kick stand, so it can't stand up.
Me: Nah, it's just two tired.
What do you call an abo with a shotgun?
Sir.
Knock knock. Who's there? Dees. Dees who? Dees nuts!
(Or dees nuts in yo mouth!)
Hey, do you remember that dragon thing?
Draggin' these balls across your face.
I might slide up to your block with intelligence. I'm a genius with a glock. There's some relevance. Took his chain, took his rocks. Took his sediments. There's no cap inside my speech. No impediments.
Putting numbers on the board, I use my calculator. Put a opp below the floor, he's a denominator. E = mc2, you didn't notice that? Had the shot, but he's too scared. Why didn't he buss it back?
Why did the skeleton have no friends?
He was a boner!
Heheheh!
Ah, see ya soon kiddo.
I'm going on break.
I'll give you some fried snow later!
What did one nut say to the other nut?
A: "Candice deez nuts fit in my mouth."
This man came up to me and asked if I could sell my house to him, and I said sure. Then five days later, he said that the loan should come in the mailbox. Then I checked the mailbox, and the only thing I saw was nothing, so I told the guy, "DEEZ NUTS IN YOUR MOUTH!"
Site nearly as dead as my trim.
She had two gallons of milk, and I was starin' at her jugs.
So, y'all remember Hitler, right?
Ok, so I own a gun with Nazi rounds. I shot a guy who was entering my home who wasn't invited. He said, "Did you shoot me with Nazi rounds?" Then I said, "Do you mean 'nein' millimeter?"
"Jack and Jill run up the hill to have sex but in a text a sibling sayed I’m on a hill sleeping with a mex. foursome peace love and biches."
Lol.
Can I put my baaaaalls in yo jaaaaaaws?
How ISS greets their friend.
"You the BOMB!"
Deez nutz!
He told me that he was in a wheelchair, and I asked, "Oh, wheely?"
My friend told me to beat that pussy up... so why is the local animal control at my door?
What do you call a lesbian on a bike?
A dyke...
