Slang jokes
Your sense of humor is like being a short bus kid: it's retarded.
Katie said that her jokes were fire. They were.
I talk with a friend about something and there comes Quandangle, things with his shoes, and I'm just like, "Bro, what the heeeeel?"
What do you call a crackhead with no crack?
Pointless.
Heh, what do you call two girls who love scissors?
Lesbians! Bahahah!
Q: What is Michael Jackson's favourite vegetable?
A: The special ed. kid down the street.
What do you call a masculine lesbian who smokes weed?
A stoned butch.
Q: What do you call a hot lesbian who smokes weed?
A: A high femme.
If you eat pussy, and if you are what you eat, does that mean eating pussy makes you a pussy?
Why is it called scissoring and not lip-syncing?
What’s the difference between jam and marmalade?
I can’t marmalade my cock into your mum’s arse.
When I tell people my girlfriend's packin', they always think she's really good with a gun.
She's actually transgender and on the waiting list for surgery.
What do you call it when two gay roosters fight?
Cockfighting
Yo mama is so stupid that she called pest control for gym rats.
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Your.
Your who?
Your hoochie coochie stinks.
Q. What's a compulsive masturbator's favourite food?
A. Jackfruit
You think your friends get butthurt?
That's gay guys.
Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks.
Every one is talking about glory holes, so I decided to look into one.
I was doing renovations on a house and found a wall with a glory hole. I was going to remodel it, but it's load bearing. I asked a gay carpenter how to fix this, and he advised that I check out the studs first to make sure they were uncut.
Eventually, I gave up and just put my nuts through the hole. Now they're walnuts.
Why do people use terms like "sucky" to mean that they don't like something?
If something "sucks," shouldn't that signify that it is at least good for one thing and will bring pleasure?