Size jokes
Yo mama so fat that when she sits around the earth, she sits around the earth.
Your mama is so fat, she sunk Atlantis even though it's in the ocean!
Yo mama is so fat, she jumped on a trampoline and she broke it.
Short girl: "How do you see up there?"
Tall guy: "Who said that?"
I spit my drink out and then ran away.
Yo mama so fat, she don't need the internet because she is already worldwide.
Your mama's so fat, when she grew an inch, she pushed the Earth down.
What type of file does it take to turn a 4 mm hole to a 44 mm hole?
A pedophile.
Yo mama so fat that she would die before reaching the gates of heaven.
Why is Santa's sack so big?
He only comes once a year.
I tried phone sex once. But the holes were too small.
If you have a girlfriend/crush that's shorter than you, go up to her and say, "You're short, lemme add some inches."
Yo mama so fat she sat on an iPhone and turned it into an iPad.
Your mama is so fat, the photo I took of her last Christmas is still printing.
Woman: I want a man who is 6 feet and 6 inches.
Man: Is 6 feet and 6 inches one thing or two?
Woman: Two, I want a man who is 6 feet and also is 6 inches.
Man: Shit!
Yo momma so fat, her belt size is E for Equator.
I spy with my little eye nothing because I only have two normal-sized eyes.
Yo mama so fat, she's bigger than the universe itself!
Your forehead is so big, the earth split in half!
Yo mama's so fat, when she went to the beach in a blue dress, everyone screamed "tsunami!"
A Texan and an Alaskan walk into a room, and the Alaskan says, "My state is bigger." Then the Texan says, "It won't be when it melts."