Similarity jokes
What is the similar thing between alcohol and anal sex?
They are not for kids.
ICE and ISIS have similar first syllables. Coincidence? I think not!
What is the similarity between an anti-joke and a clown? Neither are funny.
What’s the similarity between a broken pencil and my life? They’re both pointless.
What's the similarity between an orphan and my dick?
They both will die alone.
Memes
What is similar between a ton of kids and some boxes?
Both of those are commonly found in basements.
What's a similarity of an orphan and a deaf kid?
They both can't hear their parents.
What are the similarities between apples and emos?
They both hang from trees.
What's the similarity between a 14-year-old girl and the fetus inside her?
They're both thinking, "Oh fuck, mom is gonna kill me!"
What do the names Alan and Jordan have in common?
An.
Q: What's an animation similar to Finding Nemo, but the fish has cancer? A: Finding Kemo.
Why are women like diapers?
They’re usually full of shit, but thankfully disposable.
What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
You can't unscrew a pregnant woman.
What's a similarity between a broken lightbulb and a pregnant woman?
They're both accidents.
What is the difference between you and my dad?
Nothing.
Your hairline is like Mr. Clean's... nonexistent!
Not a joke; just a statement:
Everything on here is unoriginal! 😂 But just because every word on here is unoriginal, it doesn’t change the way we feel. Our feelings are the only thing that is original because our feelings are our own. Even though others have the same or similar feelings! Our feelings are still our own. And sharing those feelings with words spoken from another just means we are NOT ALONE in our feelings.
The 9/11 and the Spanish flu are kind of similar.
The Spanish flu was a very dangerous flu, and in 9/11, something very dangerous flew.
What's the similarity between your mum and West Ham?
Your mum blows spunk bubbles from her ass.
What is the similarity between depressed people and hoodies?
The color black.
What makes Stephen Hawking and your dumped girlfriend similar?
They can't stand up for themselves.