Shorts jokes

The reason why people are short is because their dad never came back with the milk.

You can't be short and depressed because you are compressed.

Why did the pirate kids ride the short bus to school?

Because they were retarrrrrrrrrded.

A nickname to call your short GF:

Little ankle biter Master Yoda Hasbula My little Ewok

Good night, sleep tight, wake up bright in the morning light, to do what's right, with all your might.

Your mama is so short, she does backflips under her bed.

What do you call a short black person?

By their name, you racist!

What do you call a short cow in tall grass? Udderly tickled :)

A short person should never piss off a fat person taller than them. The fat person just has to lean slightly, and it's 9/11 all over again.

What did Mickey Mouse and Michael Jackson have in common?: (What *didn't* they have in common)

Same red shorts, theme park in their backyard, white glove, soft voices, loved children, they both were black with white faces.

What is another name for a serial rapist? Short dress enthusiast.

I was walking down the street when I saw this dude just vibing. He was telling every guy that walked by if his dick was bigger than theirs, they have to give him 50 bucks.

Long story short, I walked away with 100 bucks that day.

I hate writing dwarf jokes, but I normally keep them short.

She wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts, and we're both getting sent home from school because it's distracting to boys, apparently.

A little riddle...

Trump has it short, Kennedy has it long, the Pope has it but he doesn't use it, what is it?

...

Obviously the Surname, what are you thinking about you pervert?

Yo man, stand up.

*short person stands*

No, seriously man, stand up!

Why aren’t short people allowed to be mentors?

Because you can’t look up to them.

I have a short TRUE story of how I found out my brother was gay and did "it" with his best friend.

When my brother was 12-13 years old, he fucked his best friend and I saw it. I was like 4-5 years old, UNDERSTANDING what "it" stood for at the time. All I heard was "ahh" and "mmm". The only thing that traumatized me the most was when my brother moaned "daddy". I was so traumatized that I told my mother about it, she rolled her eyes and said, "He's probably playing a game with Evan". BULLSHIT... NO YOU DUMBASS. He was playing the game "SEX", more like "GAY SEX".

I even told my father and he said, "I don't understand what you're trying to say". I told him DIRECTLY that I heard my brother say "daddy" to his damn best friend!

I actually got so curious, I opened the door and saw them doing "69". I was blank white after I saw it. I will NEVER forget that he did "it" with his own best friend.. NEVER forget about it.

(just a btw, I still have the image stuck in my head and never forget how YOUNG he was..)

(He ain't no virgin anymore I guess lmfao.)

(MORE STORIES COMING SOON =D)

Yo momma so short... You can see her feet on her driver's license photo!

My short friend called me a scrub, even though he was the one below me.