Short jokes
What did Homer Simpson say when he ran over a deer? "DOE!"
When the school shooter is gonna clap the football team but his AK jams: “Take it easy guys, I was just joking!”
My grandpa personally killed 3 German pilots. He was the worst mechanic Luftwaffe had.
what is the difference between a basement full of dead prostitutes and a bowling ball in the basement?
I don't bowl.
How is smoking similar to oral sex?
The closer to the butt you get the stronger the flavor! 🤢
Your legs are just like Oreos! I wanna split the ends and eat what's in between.
Depressed people have beautiful smiles. Okay, it's not a joke for normal people, but it's a joke for us.
You remind me of a snowflake, beautiful and unique. One touch and you're wet.
What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dinosnore!
What did the dalmatian dog say after he finished his meal?
"That hit the spot?"
I am only familiar with 25 letters of the alphabet.
I don't know why.
Where do sheep go to shop? Shears.
What’s Brock from Pokemon's favorite food?
Brockoli.
If anyone's gonna be fuckin' my sister, it's gonna be ME!
I'm treated like God when I'm home, I'm usually ignored until someone wants something.
What did the plate say to the other plate? Lunch is on me! 😂
Flippity floppity, women are property.
What do you call a sad strawberry?
A blueberry.
How do you shut Helen Keller up?
You give her mittens.
I'd tell ya a poop joke, but you're my favorite turd.