Short jokes
Where do sheep go to shop? Shears.
I am only familiar with 25 letters of the alphabet.
I don't know why.
If anyone's gonna be fuckin' my sister, it's gonna be ME!
How can you save a depressed person from a tree?
You cut the rope.
What is purple, small, and rinsed off in a drainer?
A bunch of grapes! 🍇
Your hairline goes so far back it went back to when Earth was created.
How many astronauts can you fit into a VW Bug? 11, 4 in the seats, seven in the ashtray.
What is the strongest weapon in India?
The red button (this is a fact).
What's brown and sticky?
A stick.
I found out how to gain millions of followers.
Run through Africa with a bottle of water.
What's the similarity between pedophiles and school shooters?
They both shoot when they see kids.
What do you call an animal that knows karate? Moose Lee 😊😁
My friends hate when I make skeleton jokes. I guess I need to put more backbone into it.
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
'Cause they are dead.
Q: What do you get when you drop all your potato chips in your couch somewhere?
A: A couch potato. HaHaHa
The only difference between my grandma and the Twin Towers is that they collapsed faster than my grandma.
When is a rapist safe around children?
When his plans are oven ready.
Where do rape victims buy their clothes from?
The kids section.
The mom: "Where did Timmy go after exploring that minefield across the road, honey?"
The dad: "Everywhere."
The couple next door made a porn film.
They don’t know it yet.