Short jokes
Why was the T-rex so angry? You would be angry too if your arms were too short to masturbate.
Why was the obtuse angle hot?
It was more than 90 degrees.
What movie do atheists watch for Christmas?
"Coincidence on 34th Street."
A woman walks into a library and asks if they have any books about paranoia. The librarian says, "They're right behind you!"
Q: Where do smart hot dogs end up?
A: The honor roll.
Alright kids! Find a good place to stop! Then, out of the blue, Billy died. But hey, he went to a better place.
What do you call a clever clock?
Clockwise.
Once my friend's bakery burned down... His business is toast.
Some people think Bin Laden is dead, but some think he's alive.
He is the Al-Qaeda Elvis.
People are making apocalypse jokes like there's no tomorrow.
What's the worst thing about having a Congolese friend?
He always needs a hand.
Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff?
Yea, they found her “head and shoulders“ on the backseat of her car.
How are peppers 🌶 so nosey?
They get jalapeño business.
What did the bull say to his son when he was going to school? "Bison!"
Where would a snowman go on his days off of work?
Snowhere.
Last words of the mayor of Hiroshima: “What the fuck was that noise?”
What does a peeing pterodactyl sound like?
Nothing, the pee is silent.
You couldn't spit out a good sentence, even if you ate a bowl of alphabet soup.
The worst joke ever.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
Why was 9 thankful to 6? Because 6 8 7 2.
Two nuts were walking down the street, and one was a-salted!