Short jokes
What did the caveman say while seeing a reptile taking off?
Look at that dino-sour!
What do you call a 100-year-old frog?
An old croak!
Q: What will we give to a sick lemon?
A: Lemon aid.
What's wrong with airline food...! They're not black, and they're not people. hahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhahahahXD!!!!!!!!! You're welcome?
How do you piss off a disabled person?
You put the cookie on the other shoulder.
What do you call two lesbians in a closet?
A liquor cabinet.
The "S" in Putin stands for smart.
What's a tower's favorite bagel? I don't know, but it ain't plain.
My worst fear is being trapped in a lift with a man who is confident he can fix it.
Stop with the 9/11 jokes.
They're not gonna fly.
This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be DYING to get in there.
Why did the blonde put lipstick on her forehead?
To make up her mind.
Why did the blonde stare at the Ford?
Because it said, "Focus."
They can't say no if they're unconscious.
I gave a deaf kid air pods for his birthday.
Q. If I go 1 on 1 with Harvey Weinstein, I won't get raped?
A. I'm not a 14-year-old girl.
What's the difference between my mum and my dad?
My mum stayed.
Fun fact: The body positivity movement is the only movement without any actual movement.
I wasn't close to my father when he died. Which is lucky because he stepped on a landmine.
Why does Michael Jackson like Chef Boyardee? He likes the little balls.