Short jokes
What did Stephen Hawking say when he died?
Boo Boo Doo.
What do a man and a blonde do in bed?
Sleep!
One of my family members died on 9/11, he was one of the best pilots in the Middle East.
Sally fell off the swing.
Sally has no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
The double slit experiment shows light particles are a wave that assemble in your presence. And you didn't even have to say a word!
Why did the duck not enjoy his restaurant date? Because he didn't want to see the bill.
Kid 123, how's downline Orphan what? Home! 😂😂😂😂😂 Sorry.
I would tell you a chemistry pun, but I won't get a reaction.
Me: My grandpa killed 100 nazis in WWII.
My Friend: Well my grandpa killed Hitler.
Me: *Realizes*
Why do women have no need for umbrellas? Because it doesn't rain in the kitchen.
Why do people always talk about 9/11, but seriously, just let it sit there, like the rubble it is.
I saw a sign that said, "Falling Rocks." I tried it, and it doesn't.
I have a joke about lazy people!
Actually... forget it... it won't work.
Yo mama's so old, she walked out of a museum and the alarm went off.
Your hairline is so bad people thought you were Vegeta!
1, 2 you built like a dork.
3, 4 you got no girl, 4, 5 you're shorter than a remote.
What do you call an orphan who grows up and becomes a priest?
Father Les.
What's the difference between economy and Vietnamese?
Economy doesn't work.
What is a nonce's favorite toy...? You.
Apparently Steven Hawking was a stand-up kind of guy.