Short jokes
How do you stop a dog from humping your leg?
Pick him up and sick his dick.
Hi, I did not text back to text her and dad, now I’m texting her. Now I’m.
What do you call a shitty movie? One that fucking sucks and shits.
Your mom is so fat that she broke your crush!
What do you call a place where people die?
Rosshall Academy.
What did Allan say to his sister bully when she stepped on his toe? "Mitosis!"
I am a beautiful person.
So my sis thinks she's so smart. She said, "You can finish this move ten minutes later. Go to sleep."
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
What is black and white and red all over? A newspaper.
Why didn’t the orphan celebrate their birthday?
Because they didn’t have a mom to birth them.
GF: Laying down.
BF: GROANING
GF: Are you good at aiming and shooting?
BF: Yeah, why?
GF: Shoot that did in there.
BF: Mmmhuugh
Maybe I’ll be Tracer.
I’m already Tracer!
What does it say on Stephen Hawking's grave?
"Rust in peace."
I know a lot of jokes, but I could learn a femor.
Hungry: Dad, I'm hungry.
Dad: Hi, Hungry, I'm Dad.
Hungry: Why did you name me like this? :/
What do boobs and toys have in common?
Kids end up playing with toys, but adults end up playing with boobs.
Do you like me? Joke... Well come on!
BOOMSHACKALATA!
If you're ever bored, adopt an orphan. What is he going to do, be kissed by Vedanta?
I have a bunch of jokes about unemployed people. It's a shame they never work!
What are clowns good at?