Short jokes

Spell "I hod."

If you think I sound sexy, just reply "sexy."

What does NASA stand for? Nobody Asked, Someone Answered.

What is the difference between you and me? I have parents and yours left...

Yo Mamma's so ugly, she made One Direction turn into the other direction!

You are so ugly, when you went to a haunted house, you came back with a job application.

Your hairline is dancing umlando.

Why was Huggy Wuggy not able to hug Cody’s mom?

Because she was so fat he couldn’t fit his arms around her.

What happens if you put your hand in glue? Your hand will stay there forever! I'm joking, hahaha!

I killed a man, but it was April Fools'!

Orphans can be gay, no problem, because they have no one to disown them.

Why is a priest called "father?" It's too weird to call them "daddy."

My roasts aren't funny. At least this shit gets me money.

Sam from Bow.

Why was Stephen Hawking arrested? The police used computer GPS.

"Piggy killed you with a bat because he is fat 0-0."

Roses are red, violets are blue, Mike Pence's hair is made of glue.

Hey so I like orphan jokes, and some of them are fun, but I think that's engonp.

Why did Stephen Hawking fall over?

'Cause he had a screw loose!

Guys talk to me is what the emo loner said, but seriously, talk to me.