Short jokes
Your mum is so fat, she gets hit by a parked car!
Yeah, not too bad at all, really.
What do Chinese people order: noodles in bed with some fried cat?
We were at a restaurant today, and my dad was talking about a place called Sea Ranch.
I asked, "What do they raise there? Sea horses?"
How did Peter Parker get caught as Spider-Man?
Well, he weaved a really tangled web, and Aunt May saw it.
Submit joke here.
I was going to walk to Verizon, but I decided to Sprint over to T-Mobile instead.
The other day I lost all my crayons.
I just wish I had a shoulder to cray on.
What is Beethoven's favorite vehicle?
A van.
I went outside to catch some dog, but I mist.
Why could the zombie not clap? Because it was dead, duh!
The reason why Steven H. died was that someone poisoned his chocolate mousse.
What's between a wife and a husband?
A divorce.
What do you call a baby that came out of their mother's womb? A virgin.
What was the movie about the dog called?
The woof of Wall Street.
Why do you go to the bank?
To get money.
When do you run from the bank?
When the cops come.
What do you call a grey, fat, and very old unicorn?
A rhino.
Why is a sweet potato casserole so sweet? Because it's so sweet to eat!
What do you call an amazing goat?
A goat-zing.
Communist jokes suck... unless everyone gets them.