Short jokes
What do eating a watermelon, rolling a cigarette, and eating a hippie chick out have in common?
Spit, spit, spit!
Wanna see a mistake go on camera and take a pic of you?
The short kid came earlier than I thought. Guess he came with such short notice.
What is the name of Hitler's WiFi?
The local Aryan network.
Why is England's team unfair in chess?
Because 2 rooks = 10 and a queen = 9.
What does a terrorist do when they see a twin?
They fly a plane at them.
What do you say to an upset German?
Quit being such a sauerkraut!
Hey, Britain, no queen? :(
Where is the building I was in, and why is there a plane?
I just got my COVID vaccine, and this lady said, "You have no idea what you put in your body." I said, "Yet you are eating chorizo."
What's the difference between you and a calendar?
Calendars got dates.
Did you know your dad was a magician? He disappeared the second he saw your ugly ass face!
He’s so short no one can see you very close by.
Osama bin Laden
Got like 2,997 kills, damn, that's a new record!
Your mom is so fat that when she stood on a scale, it said, "We need an actual person, not an elephant!"
Numb Butt Wheelchair Club: No Feeling, No Problem!
No matter how hard I try, I will never be a stand-up comedian.
Below I meant to say I set the gay person on fire.
What did the parent say to M.J.?
"Get off my kid!"
Why couldn't people have their phone on airplane mode during 9/11?
Because their phone exploded the towers.