Short jokes
Girl (on thirteenth birthday): Ma, why did papa leave?
Mother: Well, it started exactly 1 year and 189 days ago...
Why does the owl 🦉 have a lot of friends?
Because he’s a hoot.
What food makes you smart? Salt, because it's a mined food.
Women have less rights than a NASCAR track.
Fun fact: Toasters were originally called tanning breads!
Americans prefer houses with basements. In fact, they're best cellars!
Both man and woman have balls, but they like to play with the ball of each other because a person always loves what they don't have. 😁
My mom said, "You are in big trouble!"
I said, "Are you going to punish me?"
Puns about air conditioning. I'm not a fan.
Why are orphans terrible at baseball? They never get home runs.
What's the difference between a road bump and children crossing the road?
A road bump will make you slow down when you drive over it.
Why did the MOSFET go to jail?
It had a charge for battery.
Why don't gay Greek men in Greece perform anilingus on each other?
Because anilingus between two gay men is against the law in Greece.
I have a daily routine where I take a crap every morning at 6 AM, but wake up at 7 AM. And it's not even a joke.
You know what pun is used for "waist?"
Nothing. You'll find nothing.
It's just a waste of time.
So, you're human, huh? Well, I'm a skeleton, so not much gets under my skin.
My dumb ass thinking I made a friend, oh ya, I forgot, literally nobody likes me!
Hey daddy *winky face*
How do you make a peanut laugh? You crack it up!
How do you try to shout at someone on the bottom of the ground?
"Hey, sir! Are you dead?"