Short jokes
What’s a Mexican’s favorite sport?
Cross-country.
Random guy: "Go suck a D*ck!"
Me: Nah, I'd rather suck a 9mm.
You wanna know why I hate circles so much? They’re just so pointless! But I guess that’s how they roll.
9/11 and Jenga are the same.
It's a controlled demolition.
What is the New York fireman's favorite song?
It's raining men.
What's the difference between McDonald's and a priest?
Nothing... They both stick their meat in ten-year-old buns.
What’s the difference between an emo and grass? The grass doesn’t cut itself :D
I didn't know that COVID-19 was a thing until I saw your eyebrows and your hairline social distancing.
Depression is like having anxiety, but with more voices.
An emo texted a tree, "Wanna hang out?"
The tree ghosted her.
I have MP3s on my computer that are older than Johnny Depp's new significant other.
Ya ever think about the twin towers plan?
Me neither. It all came crashing down.
How do you circumsize a hillbilly?
Kick his mother in the jaw
I don't like it when people make 9/11 jokes. My dad was in it.
He was the best damn pilot in Saudi Arabia.
My arm: "I'M GETTING RIPPED TONIGHT!"
Why do the French eat snails?
They don't like fast food.
What's the difference between an emo kid and a pack of Oreos? The bar code on the emo kid gets longer every day.
Everything is so racist these days, you can't even say "black paint" anymore. You now have to say "Tyrone can you please paint that wall?"
What's the best thing about abortion jokes?
They never get old.
What type of file does it take to turn a 4 mm hole to a 44 mm hole?
A pedophile.